Baby-Led Weaning

One of my biggest parenting failures is that my children are terribly picky eaters.  When the twins were babies, I was so paranoid about them getting enough to eat that if they didn't like something, I quickly made something else. If they didn't like that, I made yet another meal. In addition, because Marko and I are terribly boring eaters (we like the same few meals all the time), the children have not been exposed to a variety of tastes, smells and flavours.  As a result, they only eat very few things.  Adam is the most adventurous, he will at least try new things.  Kate eats almost nothing. Not only doesn't she eat any proper meals, she doesn't even eat burgers, nuggets etc - food that kids are supposed to love!  She eats pizza, but without the cheese, without the tomato base, without any toppings except for a bit of garlic butter. With the garlic scraped off.  In other words, an almost dry pizza base. Great. Max is just as bad. Which provides overwhelming evidence that it isn't them, it's me.

So one of the things I tell new moms is don't do what I did!  Try to get your children to be a bit more adventurous in their eating habits.  Don't pander to their pickiness.  Do as I say, definitely not as I do.

And so when my good friend who has a 8 month old baby told me a bit about baby-led weaning, I thought it sounded like an excellent idea!  In essence, it is about putting food in front of your baby (from about 6 months) and letting the baby play with and taste the food, eventually letting the baby feed herself. No mushing or pureeing. 

The problem is that she is getting a lot of resistance from friends and family.  Objections range from "what a load of nonsense, what is wrong with the way we were brought up?" to "it is extremely dangerous and irresponsible, SOMETHING BAD WILL HAPPEN AND IT WILL ALL BE YOUR FAULT!". Like any new mom, my friend is trying to do her best but is also filled with doubts herself - is she doing the right thing? The naysayers are making her question her instincts. And making her cry, which is really horrible.

So I said I would ask all of you for your advice and input.  What is your experience with baby-led weaning? Have you done it yourself? Do you have any good resources for her? Is there anyone who is open to emailing my friend for a bit of advice and support? 

Being a new mom is damn hard, we need to help each other out where we can, not make each other cry.  After all, it takes a village.

Comments

[Laura]

If the food is in small bits and is mushy enough that the simple act of gumming will be fine, I don't see the harm. The baby isn't going to starve and I assume the parent will be right there to come to the child's aid if they start to choke, then good for them! I would introduce only a couple of foods at a time so if there is an allergic reaction she can know which food caused it. We started our boys on the cereals but after that they were given bits of our food just to play with and taste and neither one of them are very picky eaters. Tell your friend to listen to her gut and do what is right for HER family!!

[AJ]

I have done BLW weaning since the LO was 6 months old. One of the first things she gummed on was bagel and cream cheese. She even gummed on organic steak.

I came across BLW while following My Daddy Cooks on Facebook an have never loooked back. Tough at times I had to stop and think am I doing the right thing or should I be pureeing pumpkin all weekend - that thought/doubt lastest a few seconds and then it was gone as gut instinct said I was doing the best for my LO.

BOOKS / WEBSITES to read

http://www.amazon.co.uk/My-Daddy-Cooks-Recipes-Family/dp/144471371X/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1334492623&sr=1-1

http://www.rapleyweaning.com/

http://www.mydaddycooks.com/

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Baby-led-Weaning-Helping-Your-Baby/dp/0091923808

My Daddy Cooks and the Baby Led Weaning pages on Facebook

River Cottage baby and Infant Cookbook

HINTS

Know the difference between gagging and choking. Best be able to explain it. As this is the main worry of those that do not know BLW

Avoid discussing with your health care worker as chances are most of them will not know about it and make you feel a bad mother if you are not pureeing food.

Have some pouches ready for times of teething (Organic Bubs or if in South Africa Organix at Pick and Pay and/or Woolies. Let LO suck from the pouch

Have everyone know how to do First Aid for a baby in case of the rare chance of choking. See on the forums - it is a rare occurrence.

Food is Fun till 1. As long as the little one is getting full diet of milk (bf or formula) and is of average weight etc, no need to worry about if the LO is actually eating or not.

A lot is experimentation, textures, smells, sight etc

It is messy - one needs a decent easily washable high chair such as antilop from Ikea. When you are done stick it in the shower. Or have a dog!

Persevere - you will receive a lot of comments. But it is only for a few months as those LOs on purees etc soon have finger food and then people won't notice you BLW as much.

I have had some great looks of amazement when they saw my LO with her bagel. She is now 15 months old and average weight and healthy.

I have had grannies saying: are you sure she is getting enough to eat. They can't argue if LO is a good weight, looks healthy etc

I have felt so free at lunch when other mothers pull out bottles of homemade (or not) puree food and I can just order and hand over what I have to my little one.

It is the best to know how much the LO needs to eat. Spooning mouthful after mouthful the LO can lose the natural instinct of being full and overrides.

This is not for everyone. Some friends said they cannot do it, be it for the fear of choking (the babe can choke on purees too!) or the mess. DH hated the mess. Told him quite simply suck it up.

Any questions etc Tertia can give you my email. She can vouch how healthy & energetic my little one is.

As with every aspect of mothering, some will love it, some will hate it and neither side is right or wrong. Gut Instinct be it for purees or BLW - your call!

AJ x

[Orange]

My friend and her wife used this method (though I didn't know it was called BLW). One argument in favor, they said, was that instead of shoveling puree into the baby's mouth whether he was ready or not, the baby would be less likely to choke/gag because he'd only put food in his mouth when he was ready for it.

I think for a lot of picky eaters, it's more about texture than taste, so one would think BLW could help with that. Fresh food cut into baby-sized pieces will also have much more interesting flavors than processed jars of pureed baby food.

[Andrea]

We have done blw and have been mostly successful. We had some early allergies and sensitivities that delayed some foods, but they have outgrown them. As soon as my kids hit about 4 or 5 I instituted a 'one bite to be polite' rule. They are required to taste everything that is on their plates, but not finish it. My two oldest (10 & 11) are now starting to explore foods I never thought they would consider. My oldest used to vomit if lettuce was anywhere near him and now has a new self-imposed rule of trying a new food every Saturday. This is a long way of saying I don't thnk food should ever be a control issue for parents or kids. Keep presenting them with new things and they will eventually feel comfortable with exploring, especially as they spend more time with people outside your home.

[Natashia]

I started mine this way and now have an 8 month old that eats virtually anything! She hasno teeth yet, but can still rip chunks off of toast, sausages, biscuits etc. And can and will eat virtually anything I do.
Whenever she goes through a growth spurt I gave her slightly mashed solids off of a spoon, just because she was hungry for more than she had the patience to feed herself. But she's so independent now that she won't often let me spoonfeed her anymore, and Comes up with creative ways to get enough food into herself.

The best advice I read about it was to learn the difference between gagging and choking, as they will gag a fair bit before they learn how to feed themselves properly, and not to stress too much about the mess. Feed bub on an easy to clean surface and/or put down a plastic or rubber drop cloth so you can take it outside and shake out the worst of the mess onto the garden.

[Raylene]

I did a combo of blw and mushy food. They take so long to eat when they feedingthemselves so I also fed them a bit so I knew they were ok. Also with trips it gets really really messy! You need to resign yourslef to this fact! I now have 2 who eat basically anything and 1 picky eater who still eats but is quite particular. I think its great!

[Jeannie]

I did basically this with my kids -- mostly because they both hated purée and refused to eat it. They were way more interested in my food, so I would just cook stuff that was easy to cut into small chunks for them to eat. I had such success with this that I do think it's a good idea. My son is now six and eats a wide variety of foods -- and will try almost anything (we also have a one bite ... Not rule. Suggestion.)

To the mom struggling with family: this IS a good method of feeding your baby. He / she will be just fine. Babies will not starve themselves. You're doing just fine. Offer a variety of things, and they will eat what they like. Don't let other peoples ignorance get you down!

[Tanya]

My Oldest daughter made me realise at 8 months I didn't need to mush all her food when sitting at a wedding reception I had a muffin on the plate and well when the speech was over my muffin was gone. I realised then that I did not need to mush everything and she was now ready to move on to more foods. And being a lazy mom who hated to prepare 20 meals I was very happy to let her eat our food just more finally chopped up. She now eats just about everything except fruit Not sure how I got that wrong but she is a healthy 11 year old now.

[Melissa/Olivia Drab]

I've done this with both girls. Lauren is the best eater in the world, better than I am (which says a lot, I love almost all food.) Veronica is a bit pickier, but we keep trying and sometimes, she actually starts eating something she wouldn't touch five days ago. Babies' tastes change constantly. Offering her food she can self-feed not only encourages adventurous eating, but it helps them learn how to listen to their bodies' signals for when they are full. It's a good thing.

[Erin]

AJ and the others gave great advice! My daughter is 8 months old and we have been doing BLW since 6 months. I chose this method specifically because I don't want her to be a picky eater or develop the sweet tooth that has plagued me my whole life. She eats mostly veggies and meat with occational fruits. Even with no teeth she can gum down apple slices! Her first food was cauliflower which she fed herself by holding the stalk. During growth spurts when she is extra hungry and impatient I do feed her things like avocado or yogurt.
The biggest thing is for her to be confidant in her choices as a parent. I take a lot of crap about BLW and my other choices (like delayed vaccinactions). Most people make comments because its an unknown so I usually try to educate them about why I made my choices. Most of my friends did everything the "normal" way with their first because they lacked the confidence to follow their gut. She's welcome to email me if she wants support or ideas!

[Sara]

I had planned to do BLW, but stopped when I figured out that my child actually wanted to eat, and more than just nibbles. So now I feel mush (not really purees in general) or ground up versions of whatever we're eating. She eats practically everything, but also consumes enough to feel full and sleep at night. At a restaurant we just feed her whatever we have that's soft and can be made into small bits.

[Liv]

I say if the baby is interested in food, then do exactly as she is doing. Let the baby explore it. The only difference I would make is one food at a time so that she can observe any allergic reactions or digestive ones. Cuz we moms love to examine poop. When my kids could grasp, I gave them forks and spoons so that they could get accustomed to using them. Even in their toy baskets. And if people didn't like what I was doing, I'd say, "Well, they like and I'm right here if they gag. So we're fine. F off." HA!

[Robin from Israel]

I was a dismal failure at creating adventurous eaters so I won't weigh in there at all, but I wanted to chime in more on your end of the post - don't lose heart if your kids aren't eating yet, it doesn't mean all is lost. I thought my older one was picky until his sister came along, who ended up being officially classified as neophobic (less than 10 different food items she was willing to put in her mouth - she would literally have starved rather than eat something not on her oh so tiny approved list. She too spent years eating only the crust of the pizza, no sauce, no cheese. She didn't taste a hot dog until age 6 or 7 and only tried a hamburger (meat only, no bun) at 8. But, and this is the key, at 8.5 she is finally expanding that list, if not by leaps and bounds then at least noticeably. About 6 months before her 6th birthday we started telling her that 6 year olds were big enough to try new things (her first vegetable, for example) and to make healthy choices to help their bodies grow. We didn't actually make her try them yet, just talked it up for a while so that when she turned six it would be a familiar concept. She now has to try at least 3 bites of something new (not every single item, just the ones I feel she really would like or needs for nutrition). Why 3? Because the first one is ALWAYS rejected as something "foreign" or "new" and therefore a Bad Thing. The second gives her mouth a chance to say "hey, this is something new", and it isn't until the third that she's actually able to determine if she likes it. Not a foolproof system, but it definitely worked for us and led to a more varied diet (and made eating out a lot easier...). Now at 8.5 we're doing a lot more of the "this is what we're eating tonight and you will eat it too" for the fairly kid-friendly dinners and there's definitely improvement and far less stubborn obstinacy. I'd be happy to share a bit of what worked for us if you're interested, and if not feel free to disregard, your mileage may vary, etc. Like I said, our earlier years were a nightmare but we are finally seeing a light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.

[Robin from Israel]

PS She shocked the hell out of us last week when we were out at a restaurant and looked over to find her scarfing down fried calamari, completely of her own initiative! I damn near fell off my chair, and if my parents hadn't been there to see it I'd have thought I was hallucinating! She heard her brother raving about it and decided to pop one in her mouth and try it, so she did. And then ate so many of them that we ended up ordering a second platter.

See? Light at the end of the tunnel :).

[Kathy]

My Baby is 13 and eats anything that will hold still long enough! We pretty much let her have anything she wanted as soon as she started noticing that we were eating something and she wanted it we let her have it. I cook things i don't like to eats because she and DH like them. Our only real food rule was if I put it on the table you have to try one bite. EVERYTIME I put it on the table because tastes change. Any kid can choke down one bite and not forcing them to eat it all makes them willing to try one bite if only to get it over with. It was music to my ears the first time DD said" Mom I think my taste buds are changing I liked that this time!

AS for your picky eaters... My grandson sounds like your DD. He eats pizza (but it can't have too much cheese or sauce) oatmeal, granola bars and occasionally spaghetti if it has no meat in the sauce. He will eat ice-cream unless you tell him there is milk in it. ( we haven't' told hiim there is milk in ice-cream because it's one of the few ways he gets dairy) We though it was all kinds of things. We tried dr.'s psychologists, set. The kid won't eat. It started when he was about 2. Now we have just found out he has some significant food allergies to several of the foods he won't touch. He is now going in for extensive allergy testing to determine if this a a major part of his food problem. Don't' be paranoid about it but if she gets hives occasionally you might have her checked for food allergies. One of the symptoms of some food allergies is a tingling or itchy feeling in the mouth when you eat some things. Kids don't know how to tell us this though!

Good Luck and tell your friends that her parents got to choose how they raised their kids now it's your turn to decide how to raise yours!

[hayesmary]

Why do you eat the way you do? I mean, you and Marko are self-described "boring eaters," who like the same few meals all the time. Perhaps you could also be described as picky, unadventurous eaters. Was this something your parents did? Or were you always that way? Do your siblings share the same food preferences or are they more adventurous in their food preferences? Do you think it's possible that your children are picky, unadventurous eaters because they inherited your Supertaster genes? In other words, it's not your behavior, it's your biology.

But just consider the possibility that a different course of behavior on your part (and Marko's) might have brought about only marginal changes in your children't current eating habits.

[Alexicographer]

I guess I did BLW, though I didn't really think of it as such, I just didn't buy a lot of (or make any) baby food, and I wasn't a fan of the rice cereal we are "supposed" to feed babies in the US. I stuck softish foods (his first bite was, I think, refried beans -- a standard in US "Mexican" restaurants, basically a paste made from twice-cooked beans) in front of DS (lots of bananas), and let him eat them. I will say I used the rice cereal (do you have similar in SA?) to thicken a lot of liquidy gruels (both commercial baby food and stuff like yogurt) to make it into enough of a paste that DS could get it into his mouth using a spoon. And, you know, peas, bread, gosh, I cannot even remember. Hummus on bread, that sort of thing.

My DS is now 5 and will eat pretty much anything (I let him partake of a platter of raw oysters I had ordered when we were out at a restaurant, figuring he'd be put off, and he then ate 3 of the half-dozen I'd ordered for ME darn it! And honestly that's probably not recommended, I don't know what the actual guidelines are, but those with vulnerable immune systems like, you know, small kids, aren't supposed to eat RAW oysters, I know that. But the point is: he's game to try lots of stuff. Which isn't to say he won't, you know, have a day when he eats nothing but popcorn and peanut butter, don't get me wrong.).

So, yeah. BLW: good. Easy, and it, or something, has produced good results for us.

[Lise]

I think that's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of. Not the baby-led weaning, but the resistance your friend is getting from her friends and family. Perhaps the best thing your friend can do is develop the attitude that decisions made about her child are not up for group discussion. Her parents and in-laws and siblings, etc, got to raise their children the way they wished, and now she gets to do the same. She should not ask for advice or opinions, but learn to take unsolicited advice with a smile and a "thanks for your concern" and then ignore the advice that doesn't work for her.

I did a modified "baby-led weaning" with my four kids before it was even called that. I put small bits of soft food in front of them and let them feed themselves. None of them ever choked or had issues of any kind and by the time they were a year or so were eating a healthy, balanced diet. Two of them will eat virtually anything, one doesn't like most fruits (she's what is called a super-taster, and even sweet fruits taste sour to her) and the other has several dislikes, but loves vegetables. All of them are in their teens and twenties. The two oldest have babies who are now doing baby-led weaning and those babies are happy and healthy, and are enthusiastic eaters.

Good luck to your friend. I'm sure she's a caring mom and her child will be just fine.

[Groovymumma]

Thanks Tertia for starting a post on this topic. I have been reading your blog for ages, and loving it, but I don't think I have commented before.

I have to say BLW has been a great thing for us. I was the worlds pickiest eater for my whole childhood (I wish my mum was still alive so I could apologise to her for 16 years of not eating her food!), I only got better when I went on exchange to France (where they eat EVERYTHING) and had to eat what was on my plate or offend my host family. I still hated meat though, and once I worked out I was a natural vegetarian, I have been a lot less picky as an adult (unless you call not eating meat picky, maybe it is).

Anyway, I just assumed that my kids would be picky like me, and sure enough, when my eldest turned 6 months and I tried to feed him rice cereal or home made purees, he would not eat them. He HATED being spoon fed, it made meal times so stressful and really not fun. In desperation, I googled something like "baby hates spoon and purees" and found out about BLW. I gave it a go (whilst also persisting with the purees, as I wasn't confident he would get enough food) and it was just great. The first few times he just played with the food, then he gagged (not choked) once on a rice cake (I think that was the day he learnt to swallow solid food) and after that he was off! By the time he was 9 months old, he would eat a whole pear, including the core! He is now 4.5 and whilst he wont eat everything, he eats a wide range of food, has very healthy tastes (won't eat fast food), and has even been known to beg for broccoli or cauliflower in the supermarket! Other shoppers come up and comment when he is sitting in the trolley eating a head of raw broccoli, and I just smile because they think I am super mum when I am very far from it!

[Groovymumma]

Comment was getting very long so I thought I should start another one.

With my second child, I was much more relaxed and hardly bothered with purees or baby food at all (although she did like rice cereal). So she got family meals almost from six months. She is almost two now, and I think she has eaten every single thing on the "do not give it to your child or she will choke" list - including popcorn, raw apple, raw whole carrots, cashew nuts, steak etc etc. She has never choked (although I didn't leave her unattended to eat when she was a baby). She is not as good with the healthy food as her brother - I think she has my sweet tooth and more of a taste for junk food - but she eats the basic fruits and veggies, and loves meat.

I am sorry your friend is getting so many negative comments. I don't see how it can possibly be a bad idea to introduce kids to real food at a young age. Neither of my kids will eat very processed things like Kraft cheese singles or McDonalds chicken nuggets (both staples of my picky childhood) - they look like plastic and I think my kids think they are plastic! I tend to think that "baby food" is a bit of a marketing thing - they don't really need different food from everyone else. Of course it depends on your child, I am sure BLW is not for every kid (or parent - it is very messy at the beginning.

Of course it could just be dumb luck and my kids inherited my husband's non-picky eater genes. I have also glossed over the speed bumps (e.g. nights where I cook a healthy dinner and no-one eats it - AAARGH) but in general I think BLW is great and hope the nay sayers leave your friend alone.

[Groovymumma]

Favourite website is this one: http://www.babyledweaning.com/ because BLW should be fun! And easy! and good for lazy mums like me who are not good cooks.

Also happy to email your friend. Okay, I will really shut up now.

[Veronica]

I did a mix of BLW and purees, depending on how I felt each day. I can say that nothing went wrong and my babies enjoyed it.

It hasn't stopped them both having picky months now that they're older, but throwing cheese and crackers at the baby was loads easier than carefully mushing up carrots.

[Ellie]

Hmmm ... I never used purees (my kids range from 10-23), mainly because it seemed like so much work. I had been a nanny for years, and all of the strict and picky rules the various parents had seemed to me to be a lot of extra work. So when I had kids I figured, well, I'll try it differerntly and see. I breastfed for ages and let each baby in turn simply help themsleves to table foods (off my plate) when ready. I have two children who have consitently eaten really well, always willing to try new things, and preferring a varied diet. I have one child who has lots of sensory issues and that means food is a problem. She's actually my healthiest child though, so go figure.

[Sam]

OMG! My baby is 4months old and I was JUST reading about BLW wanting to find out more information. I am going to book mark this page, some of your readers have give WONDERFUL advice!

[Kara]

I think BLW is a really good idea. I have taken aspects of these ideas w/ my older child, who is now a decent eater.

I am struggling to incorporate BLW w/ my youngest child, who is 7 months old and at the right age for it. What I'd like to know is how do parents who choose BLW deal with the inevitable mess? My one hope is that it'll be summer soon here, I can take LO outside for meals, and then just hose off her chair and patio. If you have used BLW, do you have any tips for solving this practical problem?

[Alexicographer]

@Kara, we used a Regalo chair (search "Regalo Easy Diner Portable Hook-On High Chair" on US Amazon site to see it) that attached to our in-kitchen island (where we mostly eat), rather than a high chair. I put a vinyl table mat more or less permanently under it over the island itself, though the island is tiled with very, very narrow grout lines, so also easy to clean. The kitchen floor is tiled, so ditto. And, I figured that most of what DS was eating was not the sort of stuff that would go from "healthy, appropriate kid food" to "horrible harbinger of deadly germs." In other words, I tolerated the (not so) occasional lump of dried gruel within DS's reach.

We also have two large indoor/outdoor dogs. It happens to be true that when (DS was about 18 months) we visited extended family who lack these handy service animals, DS would sit at their table, and, if he dropped food on the floor, summon (much as one might say "garcon!" in the stereotypical restaurant scene) "Dog! Dog!" It was really very funny, though my sharing this anecdote may suggest that I am not, in fact, well qualified to address your question. Just so you know.

[Groovymumma]

Kara, regarding the mess, it never bothered me, but then I have a very high tolerance for mess (not a good housekeeper, me). We used an Ikea Antilop highchair (no nooks or crannies for food to get in), and we have old wooden floors which we could just sweep, or at a pinch mop, after a meal. Ikea also make long sleeved bibs (they look like little art smocks) which are great for keeping baby's sleeves clean.

When eating out, pick up as much food as you can from the floor before you leave, apologise to the waitress (they never seem to mind much), and leave a tip ;-)

[Student Mom (Jenn)]

I mushed up the Bunny's food, in good traditional fashion. But I mushed in lentils, beans, etc so she's had a taste for these things from day one.

When she started to feed herself a bit (finger foods) I would put an array of stuff in front of her, including olives and what have you, and she ate what she wanted. I always reverted to the mush to fill her up, but let her play with the cheese, olives, sausage, etc.

She eats almost anything now. Although she's NOT fond of nuggets, and pizza, and all the other things children are supposed to love! Her favourite - fresh fish!!

[Maggie]

My son is 16 so i don't remember much (lol), but i was always pretty paranoid about choking, maybe because a friend of mine's daughter nearly died choking on a grape at age 2. So I avoided solid pieces of food until he had teeth to chew - but he did chew on biltong (for teething) and cheese and other soft foods a little. I do want to say however that the best advice i was ever given with regards to parenting, is to ignore all advice on parenting and do what your gut and your child tells you. I suppose i was lucky, i really did most things instintively and it seemed to work. My DH and i are both fairly normal eaters, enjoying different tastes and my son was exposed to a variety of food from very young. He has and still does eat just about everything, with a few minor exceptions like feta cheese and olives. My sister's three kids on the other hand fight over olives and feta and sushi - they are 4, 6 and 9 now. They however eat just about no veggies, only meat and a few fruits and are very very picky and, IMO poor eaters. It does make sense to me however especially if a child is ready to have them try proper food instead of mushing. I remember one time i was busy making potato salad, and absent mindedly started mashing the potato! Then I knew i had done too much mushing! Good luck to your friend, and you with your picky eaters.

[Rachel]

If babies needed pureed food then humanity would have died out thousands of years ago. Do you think the medieval peasants were pureeing food for their infants? No, they weren't, and yet enough of their babies survived to overpopulate 4 1/2 continents.

Neuroscientists like this one: http://www.mayimbialik.net/beyondthesling/ are advocating for baby led weaning.

When common sense and science agree, it seems to me like the concept must have merit.

[Adele]

Ditto everything Groovymumma says re: the mess.

[Thumbelina]

I wish I had known about BLW when my children were babies, it makes perfect sense.

[Michelle]

People can be so mean with their waving fingers! Unfortunately we live in a society where negativity and fear breeds ignorance and then those ignorant people try to give us advise. Variety is the spice of life and even babies and appreciate that! :)

[Nataly]

Great post, perfect timing for us! We are about to introduce solids and I was thinking how to avoid purees. BLW definitely sounds like a way to go! Thanks to all your readers for great links on BLW.

[Sandee]

I made the same oops as you by making a meal every time my son didn't like something which created a picky eater. However, with my second son, I didn't do that and he eats like a champ. He was already reaching for our food at 3 months so I started him on spoon fed cereal at 3 1/2 months old. I also would just put baby food on his tray to let him play with it. Around 5 months, I started giving him avocado and banana in small pieces. This helped him tremendously! He was eating solids quite quickly. And it was very simple weaning him from formula to milk. The only trouble we had was weaning him from warm formula to cold milk. And he really liked his bottle.

www.herandtheboys.blogspot.com

[kim]

I definately went this route with both my boys and to this day they are small eaters but not picky eaters. they are now 6 and 3 and once a week each child gets to pick their favorite meal for the week. Tonight it was James's (6) turn and we had octopus, rice and tomato!!! Need i say more :) I say persevere as the outcome outweighs the stress and negativity u are experiencing now xxx

[Angel]

You know, when I first heard about BLW I thought it sounded familiar, and after thinking about it for a bit I realised that it is exactly what I did with my son 21-odd years ago! It just didn't have a name back then. It was just what we did.

[Sarah]

We did baby led weaning, but my son is a picky eater. Both my husband and myself are picky eaters too, so this is probably more due to us than baby led weaning... but baby led weaning is not some miracle cure for fussiness!

That said, I loved baby led weaning and have done it for both children. My thoughts on the choking: No matter how you're feeding your child, you should know infant CPR etc. A child can choke on puree too.

My opinion is that BLW is safer than purees for choking, because you're training your child in better eating habits. With BLW, you start at six months (with the child sitting upright, not in a reclined feeding chair, so the food won't roll to the back of the throat), which is the age when children are putting things in their mouth and biting down on them to feel them. So the BLW child puts a piece of food in its mouth and immediately starts mashing it. The initial emphasis is on learning to chew, rather than to swallow.

Compare to the pureed food child who is encouraged to swallow food without chewing. This seems a lot more hazardous to me.

Clearly, I have not conducted a scientific study on this, but I'd be interested to see the statistics of choking incidents in toddlers, comparing the two approaches.

[Daniela]

I agree with your sentiments - its not about making a mom feel bad especially when there is more than one way to do something AND it's clear that bubs best intentions are your friends intentions, too.

Anyways, I did (and am currently) doing baby led weaning and I have kids who eat anything, really. Sure - they are developing their own sense of what they prefer but still, they will eat if its given to them (not meaning to sound Nazi with that comment at all). As a result my nearly 10month old eats anything from chick peas to hake to avo to even olives. So from my experience, its a good one and I can only give good feedback with it.

[Claire]

A doctor-friend of ours pointed out the rather obvious but what we sometimes tend to forget... As long as they are pooing regularly, they are getting food in (by osmosis perhaps, but in nonetheless) :) Make sure they get a good multivitamin, and the occasional iron supplement when needed, if you're worried. I think kids are a lot more in tune to what their bodies need than adults are anyway.

As for the blw, I reckon its perfectly fine. When my son was 6 months old we had a chicken potjie for lunch one day.. we added a habanero chili to the pot, too. My son was sitting on my lap and tried to taste the food so I thought "well why not", much to the concern of everyone around me. Turned out he loved it, and ate handfuls more (I had to re-dish up for myself afterwards!). He was massively thirsty afterwards though :) But, no horrible side effects, and now he eats all sorts of things. I wish I'd been less structured with his meals actually, and let him eat more like that more often.

Bear in mind that that was how our bodies adapted to eat when we were still cavemen, and even though our lifestyles have changed a lot, our basic developmental steps haven't. Also bear in mind though, that back then they breastfed for 1-2 years, so she should take that into account too.