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If it's any consolation (which it probably isn't), Babyice smacked a 13 month old in the face with a toy this week and her nose bled. I don't think he even felt bad. He is only 22 months now, so it's not EVEN the *terrible twos*.

He has been bitten quite a few times by a girl at the day mother and has also been trying his luck with biting me. It's not cool.

Let me know if you find a solution to this problem!

I'm not going to comment on the smacking thing - all kids go through it - probably especially the youngest kids in a family (they learn from early on that its survival of the fittest in a pack of kids). I will, however, say that I don't think you need to worry. They outgrow it at some stage. Its refreshing to know that us moms, as much as we love our kids, can be driven to distraction with them. I've been known to react harshly out of sheer desperation of trying to get my child / children (whichever at the time is causing mayhem) to "shutup and do what I say!!!" (insert a few swear words there aswell). We are all human. Phew!

I had a response, but when I saw it was half the length of your actual post I deleted it!
For Biting and Hitting we would flick on the top of her hand so the Bunny realised that inflicting pain resulted in pain - it must have worked because she doesn't bite anymore, and if she hits I just have to say "Hey!" and give her The Look and she apologises immediately.
I hardly ever shout at her, but when I do I feel DREADFUL!!! We also do time out for tantrums - one minute per year, plus one - kinda like eggs for an omlette.

My sister once told me, "Just when you think you can't take it anymore they do something cute and all is forgiven"(at my baby shower, so clearly she's nuts because obviously she didn't know what she was talking about! Who could possibly think they can't take anymore of their beautiful bouncy baby... yeah... it was my shower - I hadn't popped out a tantrum throwing princess yet. hahahaha)

When one of my children were little they did something horrible to me - cant even remember what. Unfortunetly for them, they did it in front of my husband. He picked up the relevant child, said that is my wife, and nobody speaks to her like that, and then followed with a hard smack. The child was so taken aback that the situation was never repeated. When they were all older and they bordered on being rude to me, one of them would say 'careful she's Dad's wife'.

Man, I remember those days well. So glad they are over! Oh wait, we are starting to hit puberty on my side, with new attitude and grumpiness to deal with. Luckily it is still mostly amusing, but I can tell it is going to be challenging, and Quinn got a nice slap on the cheek a week or 2 back when he was not only cheeky to me, but then also to the lady in charge at cubs (who I had given permission to be stern with him if required). Sometimes they need a good reboot! :)

Tertia, do you know I think there's something in the air today????

I also had a terrible morning with my one twin and had to smack TWICE! and then when I got to work, two other mothers (we're only 5 mothers in the team, so the stats were good...) had also had a bad morning which, of course, cheered me up. Not that they'd had a bad morning but that I was not alone!

No answers - just as I think I have things figured out, they change the rules!

Oh Tertia, I have no advice for you - I don't have children yet - but I just wanted to say I really sympathise. I see a lot of unruly kids in my job as a family doctor and all I can say is: it's really common, and it does pass. The biting, particularly, is a phase that lots of kids go through, but it usually only lasts a short time.
Hope that bed arrives soon and you at least start getting some proper sleep!

I sympathise Tertia - Dylan went through a very bad patch about 2 months ago, where he threw regular tantrums and challenged me with everything. I think we have nipped it in the bud though, and he spent a lot of time in his room during this phase, but it was worth it as he is back to being my sweet child again. Having said that, he also hit me in the face the other day at clamber Club. Fortunately the teacher saw it and spoke sternly to him, and so did I. I thought it wouldn't help to smack him, when I'm trying to teach him not to hit me (or anyone else). He still smacks his dad or me "playfully", and I'm not convinced he has learnt his lesson. I have the opposite problem, with him being an only child, and having been at home with me so far, in that I am hoping school will "toughen" him up a little, as he can be a bit of a drama queen if he gets hurt or if another child touches him. Ah the joys of parenting.

Geeesh flipping naughty but flipping cute!!!!

My 2 YO went thru the "smacky" phase too. I was at my wits end until I instituted the Naughty Chair! I know time outs are old news, but at 20 months I thought he was too young. I was wrong. 1 min in the naughty chair for hitting has worked wonders. Hitting a child to teach them not to hit makes no sense but you don't want a heathen! Try a short time out with him saying sorry after. May be just what you both need! Good luck!

My one triplet went trough a biting stage - until I bit her back after she really bit me hard and asked her if she liked it - she never did again.

One of my kids (my daughter) liked to bite...my son wasn't into that. When you have a kid who bites or pushes, you do have to watch them more when they play with other children. You have to be on alert to watch for biting/pushing triggers and remove them from the situation/be stern, etc. You can't relax as much as you could with a child who doesn't do this. Also, most childcare places have policies about aggressive behavior, and my daughter's daycare worked with her to help stop the annoying biting. (Also...she wasn't the only kid who bit.) By the way, my daughter is now a lovely young lady in high school, and hasn't bitten anyone in many years. ;)

Also...Max is super adorable. What a cutie!

I agree, the more kids I have, the less I know! At 3 myself and knowing less than I did at 1. Gad! Also, Happy Birthday!

You put him down, get down at his level, hold his arms at his sides, make him face you, get eye contact and tell him in a firm voice, "Hitting is not allowed." Then you put him in time-out for a couple minutes. When time-out is done, explain why he was in time out, ask for an apology for the naughty behavior, give hugs and kisses and go back to whatever the two of you were doing before the incident. If you're consistent with it, this works for everything. It reminds them that you are the boss, so they are more inclined to behave the way you want, and it teaches them about consequences for actions. It also shows that even when they are naughty and you get mad, you still love them.

Rachel has been watching The Supernanny... Me too! although I am still skeptical. My 2-year-old son stops the naughty behavior but in order to concentrate on a fight to escape from the time out spot. He NEVER stays put and he screams whenever I put him back. And no way he would give me a kiss and hug after that fight. He is MAD, stays mad with me for a while and he makes sure I do get his point. I am being consistent, as the technique requires (although I only use time outs as a last resource), but I do not see that the situation has improved much. In the TV series, they always show success stories with time out, in just 1 day!! Anyway, fortunately I do not have many issues with my son; he behaves well most of the time. The worst thing is that lately he wants to smack his baby sister in her head as often as possible... Jealousy, I know, but I can't let that go; otherwise, he will throw her in the pool one of these days!

I hope you get that biting under control before he starts school. It's awful when your child is bit, but I always felt much worse when my child was the biter. I know many peds who say bite them back and I know it does work. They don't understand it hurts unless they feel it. And, 2 is not too young to have his hiney popped for being naughty.

I know we won't all agree on either topic - but that is my 2 cents worth. Our oldest is 24, so we've been through it all.

Have you ever considered another root cause? Our 4 year old has SPD and at 2 he had the same behaviour. Adam has SPD, right? Sometimes SPD is a genetic trait but may present in different behavioural issues and symptoms. Speech delay may also be attributed to SPD.

Or else he is just a two year old.

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