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I'm not a mom, so this is probably assvice, but I say if they are scared or terrified, you will be able to tell and then you should go to them. But if they just sit up and yell once and then are quiet, then you can probably stay in bed. They don't seem like kids who suffer quietly, and they will let you know if they need you. You also aren't the kind of mom that can't identify real problems; you'll know if they are having a bad nightmare and cry out in terror.

So I say, keep sleeping unless they *really* need you.


I hope you get some good advice, because I'm going through the same...exact...thing! Last night N was sitting up in bed asleep talking to himself, the other night D was up at 4 going on about some car or other. I walked in the room and he just laid back down again like nothing had happened. Arg! And my husband never hears a thing. I have a 5 month old in the house, and it's my 3 year olds that have me waking up in the middle of the night...crazy. I usually try and ignore them if they are talking and not crying, but they are 3 so they talk VERY LOUDLY and I don't want them to wake the baby up. Heck, I don't want them to wake me up either.

My kids are 4 and 6 and do this. But, I don't jump out of bed and run to them when it happens. I only get out of bed if they seem scared or are calling me and crying. They usually calm themselves down without our help and I find I have an easier time falling back to sleep if I stay in my nice warm bed. Of course, our kids don't share a room so we don't have to worry about the other one waking up. I don't know if there is anything you can do to stop it. Their little brains keep working, even when they are sleeping. We actually think it is funny to hear Payton demanding Caden put down her DS while she is sound asleep and he is down the hall in the next room.

Honestly, it just sounds like they are talking in their sleep, which is not a big deal at all. They probably aren't even aware of what's going on. If it were me, I'd just keep on sleepin'...they're just sleeping, and really probably don't need anything at all from you.

My husband is an extremely active sleeper, and will flail about, talk, walk, etc. in his sleep and not remember a thing.

Here's my best advice:

1. Find out what voice they respond best to. For my husband, it's a low, firm but calm voice. "Sam, everything's okay. Get back in bed." Active sleepers can be extremely easy to direct at times, which is helpful.

2. Humor them whenever possible. If they're restless but not agitated and start talking to you, feel free to talk back. Be cordial. Take notes. Some of it is COMEDY GOLD.

3. Don't argue with somebody who is asleep. This kind of follows 1 and 2. My husband once leapt out of bed yelling that we had to get everybody to the airport! Now! Rather than argue with him, I said "Oh, it's okay, Sam. Everybody got to the airport. Go back to bed." He did.

4. Mess with their level of sleep, if it helps. You can try this--sometimes it helps Sam, sometimes it doesn't. If he's agitated and I don't feel like dealing with it, sometimes I will gently but firmly rub his hand or his sternum, just enough to bring him up into a shallower level of sleep, one where he doesn't thrash around.

5. If they don't remember it, it's your call on comforting them. Maybe this is just how they sleep, or maybe it's a growth spurt that is messing with their sleep patterns. If it's just who they are, you don't have to comfort them through it--this is just how they sleep, and it's okay.

6. If they start walking in their sleep, you're going to need to employ some sort of kidproofing measure, like bells on the doorknob that will wake them up if they try to leave the house. Sam can get out of bed, walk down the hall, go down the stairs, around the corner and reach our front door without waking up. It's kind of creepy.

(And you're right, they don't sound like night terrors--I've got a front row seat on those.)

Unless I hear genuine terror or someone getting (or falling) out of bed, my general rule is that they have to cry out 3 times before I get out of bed. Seems to work. (FWIW, I have a 5-year-old with an active dream life and a not-quite-2-year-old who has just moved out of our bed and into bed with his sister...).

My 28 year old still does this. My 10 year old occcasionally does this. Our rule (for the 10 year old the 28 year old is on her own LOL!)Is tht if you get scared you ome get mommy or just climb in bed wiht us. If she doesn't wake up and it's only a word or two and she doesn't sound scared we ignore it and she never remembers it in the morning. It's just another version of talking in her sleep. I'm betting that if you don't go in you won't hear anything more. The kids are used to hearing each other and wont likely wake unless ther really is serious fear/pain type noises. I do wish I could say it's a phase. But if #1 hasn't grown out of it by 28...

BTW I agree with the commenter above... Keep notes they can be great blackmail, especially if it lasts into the teens.

"I suppose I should try not to jump up straight away" - Go with this thought. If you go to them every time they make a sound, you'll never get any sleep.

On the other hand, when LN7 arrives, you won't have time to baby A & K, so the problem will take care of itself.

First time here! Great blog!

get them some nice, powerful sedatives to take when they go to sleep.

then, instead of giving the kids the sedatives ...

take them yourself.

My son did this too except he used to walk in his sleep and stand next to my side of the bed...try waking up to someone staring at you in the middle of the night...scary. I would also put him to bed and he wouldn't remember it in the morning. It stopped when he hit puberty (he's now 16).

My almost four-year-old does this. It wakes me up, but I just stay in bed.

The real problem here is that you now have mom-hearing, so you're doomed to hear every sound, every grunt, no matter how badly you need to not hear it and just stay asleep, until they all leave home.


I got earplugs. Seriously. I use them with toddlers and babies. I don't wedge them in too deep, sio I can still hear a bit, and they stop me from hearing every little sound, but if someone calls me, I can still hear them (so -baby mildly fussing in his sleep, no problem. Baby crying loud enough to get through the plugs, I go.)

This is perfectly utterly normal for children, a developmental thing they do. Just ignore them and go back to sleep, unless they are freaking out and yelling or awake and in genuine need. They grow out of it.

But for some of you who are posting about adults---not so normal. Please get a sleep study done. A rare occasional night terror or waking are one thing, but doing this on a regular basis is not normal and can signal medical issues that need to be investigated.

Tertia, I had the same with my daughter about 5 months ago - she is very close in age to Kate & Adam. On the advice of the nursing sister (she says it is a very normal and emmotinal development thinggy) I tried Nervitron - a Natura product - you will get it at health shops and big pharmacies like Dischem. You give them 2 to suck before they go to bed at night - it worked like a charm. Within 3 night there was no more of it - I kept giving it to her for about a month and then stopped to see if the stage has passed and yes, it did. But you can continue to give it to them over along period of time. Please try this - it could just be the answer.

Yup, I can relate. Lindsay has always been an "active" sleeper, though A/Ds have toned that down quite a bit.

What I hear you saying, though, isn't so much about if they NEED your help (or if you should be intervening), but rather that what they do startles you during YOUR sleep, and then you have a difficult time getting back to sleep. It gets your adrenaline pumping, doesn't it? Yah... same problem here. One thing that helped me was to locate Lindsay's bedroom on the complete opposite side of the house. Her noisy sleep doesn't impact HER (ever), and now it doesn't impact my sleep, either.

Good luck! Get that sleep while you can!

I have a 4 year old son named Atticus who cosleeps with me an he does this also. He will wake up and do the same thing...scream out "Mason stop!" or some other statement. I of course wake up as I am right next to him. I just touch him and say shh...go back to sleep. But if I had to run into another room I would seriously be awake!I don't know if it is a phase or not...but it is getting you ready for the new baby at least!

I hate to tell you this but my son is 6 now and he still calls out in his sleep. I also used to get up and go to him too. Now I wake up and listen. If I ever heard him start to cry I would then go to him but as you said he just cries out and then is quiet again.

I talk in my sleep and it entertains my husband to no end. My mom claims that my brothers did too (and she said she'd go in an ask us about our secrets once we were teens).

I would agree with other commenters, that the bigger problem is how you can sleep through it ... maybe closing your door (and theirs) would work better than ear plugs, I wouldn't be able to sleep with anything in my ears, and I don't think you would either (sensory).

Or if you try earplugs, get soft wax ones instead of rubber foam. They can be molded and have no rough edges (my Gran swears by them)


Funny story, but no momvise.

My husband and his older brother are 13 months apart. My MIL went in to their room one night, on a rampage, when they were supposed to be sleeping because she could hear them talking to each other. I think they were 4 and 5 or thereabouts. When she went in, they were both sound asleep, but having a conversation in grunts and groans. It must have have so cute. I giggle whenever he tells me that story.

They are just sleep talking! Ignore it for a few nights, to satisfy yourself that they are fine, and won't wake the other one up! Trust me - kids sleep like logs, and it will not wake the other up!
And thank your lucky stars that it's not your HUSBANK that does the sleep shouting! LIKE MINE! He bellows in his sleep, stands up, runs around the bed - answers all the questions I ask him - and can never remember anything in the morning!
Now that is sleep disturbing that I cannot sleep thru! It drives me nuts!!

We run a fan on low speed during the night. It's enough white noise to drown out the small mumbles, etc, but is quiet enough that I can still hear (and react to) the real "I need mommy" cries.

Good luck!

I don't know if it's a stage, but the twin sisters of a friend of mine used to "talk" to each other during sleep. They would sometimes talk about unrelated things and occasionaly answer each other without fully waking up. Maybe it's a twin thing.

Ethan does something similar actually, usually things like "turn left..no no no, turn LEFT" or things like "wanna play crash, please mommy" I always run to him..i can't help myself - i think its phrases that they associate with a heightened sense of emotion..like when they're angry or excited. Thats what i think at any rate. None the less, even though the talking stops when i get there, I always want to make sure everythings ok. Guess its just a mom trait ;-) can't believe in 4 months you're gonna be holding a little baby boy in your arms tertia!!! unreal!

It's totally normal for them to talk in their sleep. My son does it too. Unless they are calling for you or crying for more than a few seconds, I wouldn't bother to get up.

My only momvise/assvise is if you are still using one, get rid of the monitor and sleep with doors closed! If they are truly in distress, you'll hear them anyway. and if not, you'll sleep much, much better not jumping up at every noise. Now I live in a tiny house so my son's room is only a few feet from ours so I stopped using the monitor when he was about 10 months. When he cries I hear him but if he's just fussing a little I sleep through it now. If you sleep on different floors or something that won't work obviously.


I am with Amy and Anna - I use earplugs, initially used for my husbands godawful snoring. My 5 YO twins shout out in their sleep too, and the plugs block out most of their "sleep sounds" that they make.

Earplugs, baby. While you can.

okay, ummm, I've been doing this wake up thing for ummm, lets see, Lexie is now 6.5, ummm 5.5 years now!!! Same thing, wake up,hear here, go comfort, she goes back to sleep, morning, no idea she even did it...me...well....I have NOT had a night of unbroken sleep since well......5.5 years ago.....LOL

Good Luck,

As others have said : Earplugs and/or a white noise machine. If you are the type that wakes up while they are talking in another room, then trust me, you'll wake up if there's real yelling, etc., but otherwise you'll sleep.

Tertia, as someone who has talked (and on occasion WALKED) in her sleep for her entire life, I can assure you that it is nothing to worry about. My sister, roommates, and fiance have all told me that I say things to them in my sleep. The first time or so, they think I am really talking to them, but quickly realize that I am just dreaming out loud. I rarely remember these episodes. In fact, I only remember them if I am awakened during the middle of one, so really it's better to just ignore them.
So my advice to you is to just ignore if at all possible. If they are truly distressed, you will know.
Good luck!

Hmmm I did this as a child and still do at age 30. And when I was a kid I also walked in my sleep. I don't think there is anything that you can do about it, but maybe I'm wrong?

This happens periodically throughout childhood. It usually goes along with a developmental milestone or two. You might notice after this phase is over that they suddenly are much better at X or can do Y when they couldn't before.

You shouldn't go in at all, unless they start calling for you specifically. They're actually still asleep, and you touching/talking/comforting them can rouse them more and disrupt THEIR sleep! There's also the danger that you going in and comforting is reinforcing the wakings -- not that they're doing it on purpose, but that it can cause their brains to continue those wakings because they are now having a FULL waking rather than a light sleep phase, due to your interference. This then becomes a habitual waking rather than an anomaly due to the brain growing and stretching. Make sense?

Just as an experiment, don't get up and see what happens. If all hell breaks loose then go back to what you were doing. But I think you'll find that everything quiets down. After the first night, if everything stays calm without you going in there, then start wearing EAR PLUGS! I had to do this myself, and it has been a miracle for my sleep! I used to rouse at every little sound my son made. With ear plugs in I only wake for sustained crying. And believe me, it only takes about 10 seconds of him crying for me to wake.

Good luck! A pregnant mommy definitely needs her sleep! (and congrats on the new baby, BTW. Haven't posted since lucky #7 was conceived, but I'm so very very happy for you. been reading you since before Adam & Kate were born, and you helped me thru some tough times of my own. best of luck to you and your BIG family!)

Do you hear them because you have the monitor on? If yes, then turn it off.
Otherwise stay in bed and let them settle back to sleep.

My daughter had night terrors for a while. This happened when she was adjusting with daycare. After the transition, she was able to sleep better. I hope things get better for you.

Be patient and this, too, shall pass. Both of my kids do this periodically. It seems to happen several nights during the course of a week and then they won't do it for a couple of months. My almost 5 year old is currently sleeping in my 7 year old's room to escape the paint fumes in his newly painted room. Last night at about 3:30, I hear him say, "Come on. Let's go!" His sister responded, "Okay." Thankfully, that was the end of the conversation and neither of them had any recollection of it in the morning.

Ear plugs ;) Actually I like the white noise fan idea..

Totally with the 'if they're not crying, let it go' brigade. You'll send yourself crazy with sleep deprivation otherwise.

Our 15 yr old had a bad dose of tonsillitis last week - we were a bit worried about her, so when she walked up the stairs into our room at 4am, we started and asked "are you ok?!". "Yeah, I'm good" she said. "So.. what are you doing?".... She pauses. "Oh. I must be sleepwalking". And with that she walked back downstairs to bed, and didn't recall a bit of it in the morning.

I do not have personal experience with this, but I just recently read that waking your kids just shortly after fall to sleep reduces night terrors. But if they are not having night terrors and remain safely in their beds, maybe try to not run in, but rather see what happens is worth a try? I am a run in type too, but if you find that they do not wake each other, they remain in bed and they roll over and go right back to sleep it certainly takes the worry and inconvenience of getting up out of it all.

I agree sleep talking is normal, nothing to worry about.

My twins are 12 and they talk in their sleep all the time. The talking is almost always telling their brother "Stop it!" or "I'm telling MOM!" or just yelling the other's name angrily.

If you can't sleep through it I'd wear earplugs.

very nice design bro. i like it.
I am from Malta and , too, and now am writing in English, please tell me right I wrote the following sentence: "Excessive sweating diaphoresis, excessive."

Thanks for the help :(, Elodie.

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