What do you get for the person who wants nothing?

It is my birthday soon (have I mentioned that already? A few times? Oh. It’s just that is a BEEEEG one, rather significant and all). I’ve never been a big birthday party type. I actually hate having a party as I get all anxious about whether everyone is enjoying themselves etc. However, I decided (or I think it could have been my bossy sister who decided for me) that I am having a big party this year. Of course, I won’t be drinking or staying up late at my own party, but there you go.

 

Everyone (Marko) is bugging me about what I want for my birthday, and I have no idea. I am not a gift person. And there is nothing that I particularly need or want.

 

No jewelry because of sensory issues, ditto for watch

Don’t have any hobbies

No books as read too quickly

No kitchen stuff as don’t cook

No smart clothes as am into comfort not style

No purses / bags

Not into make up or perfume

Basically have no life besides working / blogging / business and kids

 

I thought about an ipod but I am not sure I will be able to stand that thing in my ear. Plus I can’t concentrate unless there is silence.

 

Hmm, I sound terribly boring. What should I ask for? I need ideas to put on my wish list. What do you get for the person who wants nothing?

 

(You know what I really want? A new bed. A king sized super extra wide and extra long bed. A bed so large, I will have to install a megaphone to speak to Marko. A bed so massive, that we might never again bump into each other at night. Unless we want to, of course. That’s what I really want. Actually, what I want is my own bed but Marko won’t hear of that. Selfish bastard. The king sized super dooper bed is next best. I want a bigger bed!!)

Comments

[mermaid]

How about an experiential present?

Eg:
* Voucher for a massage / facial .... even thought I'm not sure if this would aggravate "sensory issues"
*Tickets to a show / concert you'd like to see
*Being taken out for a lovely meal

Presents aside, have a superb birthday m'dear!
xxx

[RainbowW]

you want a bed. ask for one. maybe several of your relatives will go in for a nice one.

or even better.

ask for a doppler.

[Lisa]

The bed sounds heavenly. That takes care of Marko's gift for you. :) My husband once got me a Snoogle body pillow for my birthday (when I was pg with our older son). Comfy sleepy gifts are always nice, especially when you're pg.

Welcome to 40! I just got here myself in June, and it is more G&D than 30, definitely!

[Jan]

How about a weekend away? With or without the hubby and/or rugrats?

[Meg]

1st commenter Mermaid said exactly what I want to say. I also don't like acquiring "stuff" but I'd love a nice meal out / massage / expensive hairstyle / pedicure /etc.

[Amy B.]

I'm not sure if they've made it to South Africa yet, but it sounds like you need a Kindle. They are sold by Amazon.com and are fairly fabulous. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000FI73MA/ref=amb_link_7808822_2?pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_s=center-2&pf_rd_r=0B1BSJFTKK748SJSJF54&pf_rd_t=101&pf_rd_p=461899401&pf_rd_i=507846 You can download books, newspapers, etc... at a fraction of the cost and you download entire books in seconds. They are lightweight and oh so trendy. Good luck and happy birthday!

[Sassy]

Buying our king size bed was one of the best decisions we've ever made. We both sleep better and are way less bitchy at each other.

Do you like any games - PS3, Wii, or whatever? There are a few new games out that are pretty cool. My husband is getting Rockband for Christmas.

Do you like movies? We're getting my FIL tickets to the new Bond film for his birthday.

Beyond that, what about some nice bottles of wine and special yummy food. An extra special moisturiser to treat yourself or a voucher to go to a fancy salon for a new haircut.

[Amy B.]

So I know that I already wrote in about the Kindle - but then I started thinking about it and I came up with more ideas....

+ Gift Certificate for the Botox that you adore.
+ Art for your home or office. Maybe something by a South African artist? You might be able to find something on Etsy?
+ What about having the woman who did your kids photos come and take a family shot?
+ New computer gadget for business or blog
+ New camera?
+ A nice pen or writing utensil. A good one really makes a difference!
+ Gift Certificate for a meal delivery service for a week+ so that you don't have to cook.
+ Donations in your name to your favorite charity.

[Heike]

I would ask for a Woolies gift Voucher from everyone. Then you wait for the next big sale, and not only have you made a few mega bargains BUT, you basically got the stuff for free (I heard olive trackies are in this season ;0)

[Kathryn]

Give the woman a bed! I don't think we would still be married without our King.

[Liz]

oh yes, get a king size bed, in fact, get a cal-king! That was the best purchase we did after we moved into out current house. It is same as a king, but longer. It fits 2 adults (one is 6'1, the other is 5'8), 2 kids and a dog, and still has room to spare. :)
Also professional massage, gift certificates to your favorite stores. You need them to stock up on baby stuffs.

[Maritza]

Get that bed already! And if you find one with anti-snore function, please let me know!

[Rachel]

Here in America, you can get a bed called a "california king". They're super huge. When the fiance and I tie the knot, that is going to be our first purchase. Also, maybe you would like a memory foam bed? I have a memory foam mattress pad and it's HEAVEN!
Other gifts:
1. "gift certificate" for baby-sitting.-So that you can have some "me time".
2. gift certificate for massage?
3. loads of comfy clothes
4. cash (hehe)
5. nice meal out with family and friends
6. new toys for the twins so you can have some time alone or some bonding time with them
I can't think of more....you are just like fiance (well, except without man parts)...hard to shop for!!!

[Trish]

Anything from Woolies. Then you can exchange and get some very comfy undies or micro meals or whatever.

[Evy]

Ipod earbuds are replaceable with headphones, if you can tolerate those, so you could still potentially get an ipod. Or an iphone?

[Renee Frouws]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...know what?
I know EXACTLY what to get you! Cause i'm the pro at present giving ;-)

You'll just have to wait to find out if i'm actually THAT good!!
xxxxxxxRen

[tiah]

Totally my own desire - but maybe appeal to you as well:

1 to 2 nights away - on my own! Husband looks after the kids. I don't have to arrange for them to be fed or any "prep" work for my "mini-break" - he'll sort them out and himself.

When my daughter is weaned, I'm totally pushing for this. Given that once LN7 comes you will have no sleep - I recommend. :-)

[Julia]

I don't like receiving presents. Sometimes (actually most times) people get it wrong. Everyone in my life knows to get me vouchers (Woolies, musica, Exclusive Books, massages, facials etc.)
A complete win-win for everybody cos they don't have to go from shop to shop looking for something and I get to buy what I want when I want it.

[Cheryl]

You can get noise-cancelling headphones, that would be the ideal gift for me at the moment.

[Jane]

You could always ask for a donation to charity be given in your name. It's been my birthday and Christmas present request for the past few years, and makes everyone happy.

[Coral]

Do not get a memory foam bed!!

Someone I know says she wakes up in a dip, caused by her body weight, and cannot get out of it!! Think of a tortoise on its' back!!

Funny to think of, not to experience I can imagine!

[Trip]

When I turned 40 I also didn't know what to ask for so in the end I let my husband get a professional landscaping company do our whole garden as I am not much of a gardner- it looks awesome and I love spending time in it - also they did it in a way that it is easy to maintain.

[Julie]

How about a delicious designer laptop bag (like these: http://www.cross-pens.eu/products/computer-bags). ) I've had mine 18 months and it still looks like new. Very dressy and smart for meetings etc, with the added advantage of not looking like a fugly laptop bag....

Oh, and I second the shopping trip to woolies - loads of comfy trackie-bums, fleeces etc.

On the more practical side, seeing as you work from home so much, how about a split A/C for your study? (Get a hot and cold one, so you can be toasty in winter too)!

[Ruth]

you seriously need a bigger bed - to stop you 'bumping into each other' - lets face it, its that kinda thing that has you right where you are now!!!

we are 6'3" and 5'9" - and have a super king bed - HEAVENLY - we can both sprawl widely and never find each other. altho i always have to be touching him somehow, so i end up hooking a foot over his leg.

then maybe some super sexy, enticing, seductive shoes that are MORE comfortable than your crocs. don't know if there are any, but someone must have some!

[Lena]

My husband also had no idea what I could get him for the big 4-0. So I paid for a week away before the new arrival.

[Gina]

Firstly, happy upcoming birthday!!!

How about asking people to make a donation to Bosom Buddies or to any other charity of your/their choice??

I often give donations instead of pressies and most places will give a certificate stating that a donation has been made in the persons name so that they know it has been made on their behalf...

[Ruth]

re your ipod comment - when you are backing your car out of a tight spot, do you have to turn the radio off and stop the kids talking?

[Chickenpig]

The Kindle is a great idea for fast readers. You can get most books downloaded at a whim, and they cost a fraction of the cost of your typical hardcover...only about 10 bucks. The Kindle itself isn't cheap, though, which is why I don't have one. I think it would be a fair price for a special B-day though, and perfect for lounging in bed during a hospital stay instead of bringing a pile of books or magazines with you.

I did get a new bed for my birthday this year. It is only a queen size, we had a double before, but it feels great. It is all carved and fancy and stuff :) I love it. We had the bed in storage for over a year, but it had to be taken apart just to get it into our bedroom and we had to purchase a new mattress. I'm not sure if it qualifies as a present for just me though, since my hubbie gets to sleep on it too ;)

[Darkchocolate]

Go for the under bed. i would desperately like one. but the thought of shopping for uber linen freaks me out. the cost could be astronomical

[Darkchocolate]

uber bed .... not under bed

[Candice]

I think there have been some fabulous suggestions but if what you really want is a new bed I say GO FOR IT!! A decent bed is farking pricey, right up there with a watch or a {very small, teeny tiny} diamond... why don't you get Marko to buy the bed & the rest of the friends & family to spoil you with some divine new bedlinen{or Woolies vouchers so you can buy your own!}.
And well, if you ever decide that getting a new bed for the big four-oh was an ass-holish idea - that's just too bad 'cause you made your bed & now you have to lie in it, bwahahaha!!!

[Lesley Watt]

I love big beds. Up until June 2008 I only ever had a single bed then when I moved to my own flat I bought this big double bed... you can just go in the middle in a star shape.

[alison]

Hmmm - sadly Kindle is tough to pull off outside the US. It's possible - but you'd have to do all downloads online, and you'd need a credit card with a US address... But of a bugger there. Not to mention, with the exchange rate, book downloads would be around $80 on average.

Bose. Noise Cancelling. Headphones.

[alison]

I mean, 80 Rondt.

[Sue]

Oh I'm a huge fan of the big bed idea. I'm the same way. BUT, my dad is one of those who doesn't ever need or want anything, so every year he names a charity we can donate a few bucks to in his name. He absolutely loves that.

[Bethany]

I love it when people answer their own questions!

A BED!!!

What could be more perfect? It's exactly what you want and if everyone is asking what to get you, they could all pitch in.

Ask for what you want; All anyone really wants is to get the person they love what they will truly appreciate.

WISHING YOU A WONDERFUL BIRTHDAY!!!

[jacki janse van rensburg]

i have the super big, extra long, extra (deep) high bed. and ALWAYS battle to find linen for it! and if you do find some, it's expensive, and not in the colours you like... uggh! why is nothing ever easy? (i live in SA)

it is wonderful to sleep in, though. especially after a fight. no need to sleep with your head on the bedside table to be as far away as possible...

[diane]

Candace totally took my comment!

A new bed and family can pitch in for super high threadcount sheets!

What could be better?

Happy birthday!

[kristylynne]

Go to the department store and register for the bed you want, and new linens to go on it. Then everyone can pitch in.

Or, pick your favorite cause and ask everyone to donate in your honor.

[mama-beans]

Stick with the king ~vs~ the california king... the king size bed is wider!

Happy birthday!

[JConroy]

Go on a big vacation during your 2nd trimester...somewhere you've always wanted to go. That's what I'm planning for my husband who never wants gifts or parties or to spend any money on anything. I'm taking him to Ireland. He's always wanted to go there and never gets around to making the plans himself.

Good luck & Happy B-day.

[L.]

I was going to suggest the Kindle too! (Don't have one, want one.) Too bad it isn't totally SA-compatible. I agree that the new bed is a great idea if everyone wants to pitch in, or an experience like a vacation.

Happy upcoming birthday, regardless!

[marine wife]

pedicure and pregnancy massage!

[Tine]

I am everyone's most dreaded giftee. I honestly want nothing...meaning no thing. I am so NOT into material objects, and I hate it that people feel the need to give me stuff.

When people badger me for gift ideas and won't let up, I tell them I want fun, not stuff. If appropriate, I ask for a night of babysitting so hubs and I can go out. Or a membership somewhere (local theater, concert hall, museum, whatever). Or a gift card for a new restaurant I've been wanting to try. Or concert tickets. Experiences like that mean MUCH more to me than stuff.

[Hadey]

My dad is the same as you. He never wants for anything but books and camping equipment. We usually end up getting him some kind of electronic gadget that he would never otherwise buy for himself but ends up loving. One year, however, I bought him a goat. Not an actual goat, at least not for him. I purchased a goat in his name through Heifer International (http://www.heifer.org/#) that was donated to a family in India that would use the goat for milk. When I explained the gift to him he said it was the most touching and meaninful gift he ever received. So, why not ask people to buy goats, ducks, sheep, etc. (there are lots of options to choose from) in your name to help out a family less fortunate than you in a developing country? You may not WANT anything, but they NEED it.

[21stCenturyMom]

I would think that for you, the gift of time is the best gift of all. Time to get away.. a free pass without complaint for you to stay glued to your computer in the evening when Marko wants you to watch TV with him... that sort of thing.

[wendy]

I highly, HIGHLY recommend the king-sized bed. it has changed my life. I adore it. I think about it when I am at work. If I am having a rough day, it's what I focus on as my reward. My husband snores, but my bed is so grand that it no longer bothers me. I call my bed "the Island" because it so large and comfy and cozy, and it is a vacation every night. Please do get one - you will never go back.

[Keri]

How about restaurant gift certificates so that you can go out with friends or with Marko when you are not annoyed with him. ;) Do you have a favorite coffee shop/pastry shop? Maybe certificates to those places?

[kathleen999]

So ask for a new bed? And then find some bedding, pillows etc online and email the links to everyone else and they can all conspire to get you lovely new bedding and pillows. Then you can have your bed paradise.

I love my bed and there is nothing better than having a beautiful comfortable bed.

We are both tall too and we have a king size bed. I actually can sleep all night without really knowing my husband is there. Although I do like to snuggle sometimes.

[kathleen999]

Oh, here's another idea. I asked for spa certificates for my birthday this year and got a bunch. Now I get to go away for two days and get pampered. Maybe ask for that, or maybe you should ask for travel gift certicates and you can go away to a hotel for some precious alone time.

[Anna]

Happy Birthday. A new laptop? A new camera? How about a vacation?

[Ashlee]

Obviously ask for a bed if that's what you want!

Another suggestion, I remember a while back you mentioned wanting to learn photography and your friend was going to help you? What about getting a DSLR camera? The entry level Canon and Nikon's are very reasonable these days!

[Jill]

HOw about an awesome new camera or Flip video?

The solution to the bed thing: One bed, made up on two sides, like a half beef/half cheese pizza. On our queen size bed, we use 1 queen fitted sheet, 2 twin top sheets, 2 twin blankets + additional blankets if needed for cold. That way I have my own sheet and he can kick his off if he wants. I have my own blanket I can wrap up around my ears if I want - or not. It save our marriage.

[jane]

a Kindle, you must get a kindle

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000FI73MA/ref=sd_allcat_kdp

[Nola]

We recently moved from a queen sized bed to a chiropractic endorsed KING sized mattress (Cloud Nine - we purchased it from our Chiropractor). It has been the best thing we have ever bought. I'd sooner give up my laptop than give up that mattress. It has memory foam and I cannot even feel hubby turn in bed...in fact, he could jump on the bed and I wouldn't feel it. SOmetimes I think he's out of bed and have to stretch my leg wwwwaaayyy over to see if he's still asleep. Best of all, both of us have stopped snoring...bonus.

[Boulder]

I'm not going to read what everyone else has written, but I'm guessing you are now realizing just exactly how very pregnant you must be to have not come up with the inevitable suggestions of woolies, spa treatments, hair cuts and/or color, botox, and bottles of wine for your enjoyment after the pregnancy. This makes me laugh out loud, darling.

xoxo

[Heather]

We love our king size bed! We bought it right after our daughter was born. Now we can all snuggle in it and not touch each other. Except somehow our daughter still manages to take up the whole bed. I'm definitely training her to be a single woman. I don't think she could share even a king size bed with someone else.

I think you need a bed for your birthday big time.

[Juno]

'Don’t have any hobbies' - that just cracks me up Tertia. No hobbies? You mean, apart from writing SA's biggest and most popular blog?

[Ingrid]

What about a memory present, like a portrait photo of you and your family, life at 40! Sorry you never mentioned that, but I assume that is your next milestone.

[Terrie from Oz]

A voucher for more botox (when you are obviously finished with the whole pregnancy/breastfeeding thing)