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Oh, Adam. That is freakin' priceless.

And as a fellow white South African of similar vintage, I would be right there with you with the sweaty pits. You'd have to have grown up with it to understand...

I have a 5 and 2 year old and have spent much time attempting to help them understand that not every human being is as fortunate as they are. Not an easy task because realizing that not everyone has (all that they do) sort of shakes the foundation of their sense of security a bit but we seem to work through that okay.

Anyway, we do a lot of support/charity work in our local community but I have recently been working with them to understand issues on a more global level as well. This site has helped tremendously. http://www.markmakers.org/default.aspx I think my kids are starting to get it. They always get a gift card for their birthday and at Christmas which they use to buy for other people from the site.

Oh my lawd. I would have DIED! Adam. He's priceless, honestly.

I've really been enjoying your posts the last couple of days- I think that race is a topic that we should all talk about.

I just got back from a family vacation - it was a bunch of friends and my in-laws. One of our friends is black, and I never really think about it. But on the trip, he was the ONLY black person there - the whole town was white people. Made it seem a little more obvious and I wonder how he felt.

I have to laugh at Adam's innocent comments - think of how much can be changed just through one generation!
:) Becky

Haha. Some of my best friends are South African so I get, to a small extent, what's going on in your head at these times. Adam, btw, is hilarious and wonderful.

Oh Adam, you funny, funny, funny child.
I near about spit my gum out when I read that.

Oh, how sweet! I love the innocence of kids.

I would never say you were too sensitive about racial issues. On the contrary—too many people give too little thought to such things.

Sounds like you will be asking your kids (heart pounding, pits sweating) "What do you mean by that?" a lot over the next few years!

Adam and Kate may well have classmates who would say the things they say, but with a different intent. Not all kids are lucky enough to grow up in a home where they're not taught to view others (people of other colors, gays and lesbians, etc.) as inferior or bad.

I was at the Children's Hospital with my two sons last week and I realised that it's taken until they are 9 and nearly 8 before they stopped saying stuff like that at the top of their voices. This time I was nudged gently and my oldest whispered in my ear "So what's wrong with that boy? Why is he in a wheelchair and dribbling like that?" Proudest moment of my life to date I think.

I know what you mean about the racial issues, I'm living in Darwin (north Australia) now.

Darn you, woman! Weeks ago, I deleted around 20 blogs from my favorites and was feeling a bit self-satisfied. Then, when I was reading and minding my own business, I found you. Now you spring Mel on me? I have dusting to do. Later sometime.

Funny, funny, funny!

You know what I find very difficult to understand, is that yes, most white South Africans are appalled by the apartheit system. It sucked, no argument. However, why is it that you "wealthy white people" (your own words) only send your children to the elite private schools where 90% of all children are white, and 100% of all children come from very rich homes? Before the children are even born, their names are put down to ensure that they do not have to go to some "plebby government school".

Surely the best way to show your children that there is no difference between black and white is to send them to a normal government school, where there are kids of all races and all social classes.

The argument that the level of education at government schools is not up to standard is rubbish. The government school that I went to is still on the same level that it was some 20 years ago - probably even better. I have researched some schools, in case we need to return to SA.

Not to attack you, but I think maybe your teachings to your kids about race and social standing are a bit paradox (if you are intending on sending them to an elite private school). Otherwise, just ignore my contribution. By not having your children mix with "normal run of the mill" kids, they will alway be very aware of the difference between black and white and social class.

Both my boys go to a school where 90% of the children are "non-white" (blacks, indians, chinese etc). For them colour has never been an issue. We do not even talk about it because I don't want it to become one. There are more "white" schools here in Zambia, but I chose this school particular for this reason. I want my boys to get a realistic view of the world from the word go.

The Innocence of Children.... Adam is a gem!

OMG...Adam is hysterical!

I am a classist - yep - admit it, I don't want my kids to mix with rubbish people AND I DONT CARE IF THEY ARE WHITE, BLACK, PINK PURPLE ETC. Note: I say rubbish NOT poor as money has nothing to do with manners and behaving properly. I am putting my girls into private schooling because I want my girls to mix with a certain calibre of people and hopefully not be stabbed or decapitated at school (and by the way Heike from Zambia the latest violence at a "government" school here in South Africa was white-on-white violence.) Before you bite my head off Heike - I am not saying that all children who go to government schools can't behave normally, I went to a government school. Unfortunately today life is too complicated to take risks, especially where children are concered and if a parent can afford private schooling (and we will be making huge sacrafices to afford this) then why should'nt they. We all have choices, you have yours.

A friend of mine's son goes to a "good government school". She has to buy him new school shoes every 3/4 months as they are stolen. He cannot leave his gym bag unattended - the contents have been stolen twice before. This is building up resentment in her son, not teaching him any lessons of equality or tolerance.

And to add to my last comment above Heike from Zambia. Most people put their children into private schooling because they would prefer 20 children to one teacher and not 33-40.

Dear Tripsmom

Since you felt you had to address my comments, I though I might just respond.

Your post illustrates exactly why the terms "rainbow nation" "reconcilliation" and "everyone is equal" are just an illusion.

I take cognisance of all your points about goverment schools, but then I do ask myself, how do we "get together" as a nation, if the rift between rich and poor becomes greater and greater? It's almost a catch 22 situation, isn't it? How do we teach our children that we are all equal if they do not experience this equality first hand, and on a day to day basis?

I love you dear! Remember me? The mexican/white gal from Texas, USA that dumped her South African fiancee' because I discovered he was a pigass racist! I must tell you that I think it is wonderful of you to discuss/defend and break away from the apartheid hangover (loverly phrasing btw) that still haunts your beautiful country.


Oh I'm LMAO here, hilarious.
And I soooo feel your pain. My 3year old daughter keeps shouting in the middle of VERY busy areas "Mom, why is that black man so dirty?" or "Mom, why is that white girl crying?" Every SINGLE time I just go stiff with shock, and ask very carefully, 'Which man?' (or girl, or whatever), and EVERY TImE it's "The man with the black t-shirt' or the 'girl with the white dress'.

Race sensitive? Never!

Heh, the witty mum has passed her genes on to her kids too. Much cuteness.

Can I have him??!!

Oh, and for the record....what an outstanding example of addressing the race conciousness/children/healing from apartheid/parenting debate, without it being a call to adversarial confrontation from commenters...ahem.
Just an entirely honest, humane and funny example of how so many of us try to get along in our world, doing our level best.
And did you happen to see our next (US) president's ass-kickiing acceptance speech last night?
An Obama Mama

You often make me chuckle but this one really made me laugh out loud. Thankyou :)

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