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I am sure your kids will be fine. It's such a huge milestone sending them to school. It's when they cry and perform, you feel a bit shitty. But, when they turn around, give you a little wave, and smile, happy to go, you feel even worse, believe me. It makes you feel like they would rather be at school than with you. You even get a pang of jealousy. So, for you, I hope they cry and cling (just a bit). For them, I hope they skip off into the classroom filled with excitement and joy.
Regards
Heike

Ours just started too. It has been rough. Zacky cried every day. Nicky is happy go lucky, skipping off to find the crayons and draw 60 gazillion pictures. But after 4 days, Zack is crying less and they both get gold stickers when we pick them up "for being big boys and going to preschool." Not for being good, just for being big.

I hope your two love it immediately. If not, know that they will get used to it and that you have to tough it out with them.

They WILL be fine and so will you. Just remember, take them in, just them situated, kiss and hug and walk out!! Do not hang around, it makes it harder to leave.

For the first month of Junior Kindergarten here, my three and a half year old son was alternately pried off of me or the doorframe by the (amazing, wonderful, kindhearted)teacher while he cried and screamed. My job was to smile brightly, say "I'll see you after school, sweetheart!" and walk away without looking back.

Both the teacher and I knew that he needed those few minutes to scream and hate me leaving him, but that within five minutes, or sometimes by the time the door hit my ass on the way out, he would be happily playing or visiting with other kids.

Now he rushes to be first in line in the morning, so he can get the coveted job of holding the door open for his classmates. He barely waves goodbye. I have to ask for a kiss.

Your kids will likely be fine. It is so hard to leave them at first, I kept thinking mine were too young, needed me, etc. But they were fine after the initial transition problems.

The absolute best thing you can do for Adam and Kate is to give them each a hug and a kiss, smile brightly and say "I'll be here for you after school!" and walk away without looking back. If you waver at all, they will see that and the hysterics will go on and on, making everyone feel worse. If they see that you are perfectly happy leaving them at school and exude as much confidence as you can muster (it only has to show on the outside, you can be as jelly-like as you wish on the inside), then they will know that you have left them somewhere safe where they can have fun and be taken care of by the teachers.

My children's first playschool had a little basket of travel kleenexes by the front door with stickers on them that read "It's okay to call." and then the school phone number. I always thought that was a nice gesture for all of us inwardly jelly-like parents.

My son used to give me such guilt trip when he first started pre-school a long time. But as soon as I stepped out the door, he stopped crying!
They have a lot more fun playing with other kids than be stuck at home.

Please be prepared to be the one crying when they simply can't wait to get out the door to go to school. It happens!

Tertia--don't be silly. Of course you're scared. It is a BIG DEAL. But it is totally, totally doable, and Adam and Kate will be that much better off for it.

I stayed home with my little guy for 14 months, until it was financially unreasonable to do so anymore. My husband is a teacher and he was home with him for the first couple weeks, and then he went back to work and Max went to daycare. The teacher was sweet and great with Max and got him to eat all kinds of things that he wouldn't have eaten for my husband or I. She had three boys of her own and so she knew all about raising boys and why mine acted like such a lunatic sometimes and what to do about it.

We moved and changed daycare this fall. If the last daycare provider was good, this one is GREAT. The two of them are crazy about each other, she also has four kids who participate with the daycare kids. He gets to spend time with bigger kids and littler kids, she has a lesson plan posted every day so we know what he's learning and doing and even having for lunch. I love it. He talks about her on the weekend--sometimes he talks to an imaginary teacher when she's nowhere around.

School is great, even if your kids cry. And they probably will cry. But then they'll stop and they'll play with the other kids and have a ball and not want to go home at night. Give them, and yourself, some time to adjust, and until you do, keep your chin up and don't let them see you sweat.

Good for you, by the way. This is a big step, putting the babies in school. It was for me.

Savour the moment, painful or not, its a major milestone. Live it and love it!

they'll scream and cry when you leave. two minutes later they'll be fine. its more reassuring for you if you have a place where you can see them but you can't see you so you know that this is so. trsut me, they'll be fine.

oh yeah think of it this way.

the first thing you can do when they're at school is take a shit.

by yourself.

without children in there too.

that's a big thing.

You will all be fine...eventually...
I'll be thinking of you.

It is a HUGE adjustment for everyone - just keep that in mind. They will have a great time, though, and you will see them grow and learn by leaps and bounds. Not that they weren't doign that already, but when they are introduced to a new environment and new people and different interractions - it really makes them extra-spongy in their learning - they just absorb EVERYTHING.

You asked the teacher to come over to your house? Wow, you really are a big asshole baby!

P.S. All newborns are asshole babies too.

Take heart! You have the best of the best -- twins! They have each other. I have felt so blessed that my kids are twins, and even though they do much of everything differently, they always have each other. In preschool they tried to put them in separate rooms and I said -- no way! And I am glad I did. To this day (they are now 10) they have each other, and that always warms my heart when they are out in the big world without me.

Breathe. It's okay. You'll be fine, and eventually you'll enjoy ditching them for a few hours a week. They'll LOVE it! Remember, just Breathe

There will be days, if they're like my girl, where they don't want to go to school (daycare, in my case). And then, there will be days when they don't want to come home (which also hurts, but in a more bemused way). They're kids, it'll just depend on their mood at any given moment.

Have faith, sister.

When my kids were going to start school my older son was over 3 but my younger one was only six months old. I felt bad and didn't want to leave them but then I took them to the school to check it out and they both absolutely ADORED it. I looked around and though "how could this be bad for them when it looks so fun?" Even the baby was just off exploring the toys and the play area and my older son, once school had started in earnest, told me once that we should bring our bed to school so we could live there. I hope your kids will love it as much as mine did and I hope that will help make you feel better about them going.

My separation anxiety is all in the bedroom. They both have slept in their bed since they were pretty little (my older boy from 3 mos, my younger since birth) and my older boy has moved to a couch in our room because there just isn't enough room in the bed anymore and sometimes I think I have just as much, if not more, apprehension moving him to his room and his bed (he has one, he just never uses it) as he does. I mean, it's all the way across the house! I don't care if he's four, he's still my baby.

Sorry. My bed. They both sleep in our bed. I guess my post as written doesn't make much sense.

It's a big deal the first day of school. Even if it's not "real" school yet - it's big. The head teacher at preschool when we had orientation a few years ago said the best thing and it still stays with me. "Don't worry moms...they're our babies too." I caught more than one of us with tears streaming down our faces. It is weird thinking that your kids will be having a whole new set of experiences and you won't know half of what they're talking about. They will be fine...and so will you. Tears are a natural part of it for everyone (you AND the kids). And don't be surprised if they surprise you and don't cry either!

It's a big deal the first day of school. Even if it's not "real" school yet - it's big. The head teacher at preschool when we had orientation a few years ago said the best thing and it still stays with me. "Don't worry moms...they're our babies too." I caught more than one of us with tears streaming down our faces. It is weird thinking that your kids will be having a whole new set of experiences and you won't know half of what they're talking about. They will be fine...and so will you. Tears are a natural part of it for everyone (you AND the kids). And don't be surprised if they surprise you and don't cry either!

You and those babies will be fine! There will be an adjustment period, but I'm certain they will thrive. Congrats on the big step!

I bet they will be just fine. Like you said, they have each other, so that is an immediate comfort. And, they are old enough to handle it. I first took my son when he was only 1, and that was too young, he cried when I dropped him off. Now he is 2 and he runs right into the room without looking back.

Here is my best assvice for you: Reassure them over and over that you will be back to pick them up. That is our mantra: on our way to school, I run through all the fun things he will do and end with "and then I will come to pick you up." Now, if I even mention the word "school," he says, "mommy will come to pick you up." So he gets it, and he is really comfortable there.

I think it's great that the teacher came to your home, BTW. She must be a winner.

When my son started playschool it was a bit of an anticlimax. He was comfortable from the start (a little less comfortable for a brief period a few weeks after he started which is common so prepare yourself). The hard part had been deciding to sign him up to begin with.

Wishing you all smooth sailing.

yanno, my daughter's preschool is in a brand-new building, and they have closed-circuit cameras so on those occasional mornings when she's crying and breaking my heart, all i have to do is walk back up to the front desk after leaving her in her classroom, and then i can see her with my own eyes, and how well she does LITERALLY THE MOMENT I LEAVE.

does your kids' school have something like that? it gives me fabulous peace of mind.

Just did this is September. It was fucking hard. I cried for the first three days. The first day was the worst. And my son (SID issues too, turns 3 in feb) had a rought four to six weeks - BUT all is well. He loves it. Wants to go more than the two mornings he is going so we are adding a third morning in march. I wish I had some sage advice but I don't. Its just hard. But its the best thing. Also, leave FAST. I mean, each kid gets a kiss, told they are going to have fun and you exit. I cannot emphasize how much a difference that makes. FAST EXIT. Also I tried to always hook them up with a teacher as I left. That helped too. Good luck.

What a big deal!! You will all do great!

Its a huge deal for any parent, even us ones who are not big arseholes. I can't believe you invited the teacher over, thats major, even for you! Any change is scary and exciting but later on we look back and wonder what all the fuss was about. They will have good mornings and bad mornings, they will manipulate you shamelessly until you are a quivering heap of mommy-guilt, BUT they will have a brilliant time and learn and socialize and bring home endless art that you don't know what to do with. I don't suppose you can do some condensed theology lessons? Praying with my kids and telling them they can pray if they are having a hard time helps us lots.
Good luck, stay strong.

You will ok, they will be even more ok. Wishing you loads of strength :)

Hope all goes well on Monday...

Good luck!!! thinking of you

I have a feeling that Kate EE is going to challenge you when you say something. I have this picture in my head of her standing with her little hands on hips saying "but mommy MY teacher says..."

Will be thinking of you on Monday...

The summer before my oldest started Kindergarten I nearly had a nervous breakdown (seriously). I couldn't eat or sleep, I started smoking again, crying all the time, etc. My husband begged me to go to therapy. I had been home with my daughter every day since she was born. I couldn't fathom letting her go, the thought was too much to bear.

I cried and cried as the bus pulled away. I cried all day at home with her little brother. I had people I know call me from her school (they taught there) to tell me she was doing great. She came home EXHAUSTED but happy.

The next day, everything was fine! I quit smoking, I started sleeping, eating, and functioning. The months leading up to it were much worse than the actual letting go was.

She's in first grade now and things are grand. I hope I'm not as bad when her brother starts pre-school in the fall!

just don't let them smell the fear. talk positively and reassuringly about the school. don't belabor the drop-offs. i worked at a preschool and can say that it's good to have a quick, routine goodbye. they will cry. especially if they think that they can play you (for extra time, extra hugs, or guilt that'll buy them treats later). just let them know you love them and will come back soon. almost every kid cries a bit and then stops as soon as mom leaves. they will cry longer if you make the goodbye longer or indicate that you think they might not like it.

It will be ok. It will be ok.

You know something? It'll be 5pm somewhere when you drop them off. So maybe bring your wine with, and it will help?

They will be fine, either sooner or later. I help in my daughters preschool, and all the fuss is until the parents are gone, then the kids redirect their attention and have a good time.

Also, it is not a parents job to make sure our children are never unhappy, or never wrong, or never scared. It is our job to teach them how to deal with being unhappy, wrong or scared. Life will bring challenges starting from day one, and it is our job to help them deal with them, not shield them from everything. Sometimes (forgive me) you sound overprotective.

Good luck Tertia! They (and you) will be fine! It will take some adjusting... but you'll all be cool!

They will be okay. REALLY. And you will be okay too. Once K and A see all the neat activities and toys and friends, they will be excited to participate, and so proud to show you the crafts they made, tell you about the stories and songs etc. They will learn the school routine, and will probably tell it to you step by step, over and over again. Some of those behaviours can be carried over in a positive way at home too, like tidying up toys, putting away coats, washing hands etc. - that was a great benefit for us. I quickly grew to LOVE preschool because it made our trio so happy, and they got to do so many interesting things in just 2 hours - way more than we did at home. They were more content for the rest of the day because of all the fun they'd had in the morning at preschool.

Would it help you to have Rose or your mom come along for the drop-off on the first couple of days, to give you a spare pair of hands with the kids, and to have somebody to talk to afterwards about how you feel, and how great the teacher is?

I was prepared for at least one child to cry and cling when we took them to school the first time, but the teacher helped them to engage in an activity immediately on arrival (tray full of beads, play-dough etc.) and they barely gave me a wave goodbye. It was me who went out to the parking lot and sobbed, overwhelmed by what a big milestone it was for us. The kids were quite fine! And the second day I was fine too. I hope it will be that way for you!

It ok to be anxious about things in life, change isnt always the easiest thing. Doesnt help that you lost your son this week only a few years ago.

Greeting. Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
I am from Nicaragua and also now am reading in English, give true I wrote the following sentence: "If you buy bingo sets from publishers, youre limited to what they have in stock.The mecca bingo venue in knotty ash, liverpool, recently rewarded one of its longest serving members with a surprise birthday party."

Thank 8-) Faizah.

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