No, YOU do it

I heard today (not for the first time, but it is now getting more real) that age 3 is worse than 2. This frightens me. Very much.

Conversation this morning:

Kate – “where’s Kate’s dummy?”
Me – “I don’t know, why don’t you go find it.”
Kate – “No; YOU go find it”
Me – “You are very cheeky”
Kate – “No; YOU are very cheeky”

The rate of their language acquisition is amazing. I can’t believe how well they are talking now. Too well actually.

I gave them a glass of milk to drink and told them not to spill. 3.5 seconds later Kate had spilt hers. Before I could say a word she says “I knew it!! I knew it.”

Last week we were watching TV and Adam asked “what’s that, mama?” (it was some kind of cartoon gorilla thing). I said “that is a monkey” (close enough) and Kate pipes up, “Actually; that is a bear”.

Actually. 

Well, excuse me, actually!!

I said “no my girl, it is a type of a monkey called a gorilla*” and she retorts “No Mom! That is a BEAR!”

I left it at that. There is no way you can win an argument with a two year old. They always know better.

(*close enough, I know it’s an ape etc, but if we are already hotly contesting the monkey vs bear thing then I am not getting into the monkey vs ape difference)

She has taken to calling me ‘Mom’. Mom! Sounds so grown up. What happened to mama and mommy? Now it’s “No Mom! YOU do it.” I have to do everything around here. That can not be right.

Yesterday my mom took them to visit my aunt. As they walked from the lounge to the upstairs rooms, Adam turns around and says “wow, this is very nice”. (Interior design tendencies? Fab Five becomes Fab Six in a few years time?)

At my sister’s birthday breakfast a few weeks, her youngest daughter spilt something and Kate stands up and says “Oh. My. Goodness. ME!!”

It is so weird / funny to hear your words coming out your two year old’s mouth. In your exact tone and intonation.  

Not so funny when your two old drops something and says “SHIT!”

Comments

[JuliaKB]

Have you ever seen them pretend to talk on the phone with your exact words, intonations, and hand gestures? No? Well, it's coming. Try not to pee yourself when you see/hear it for the first time.

[LaurieC]

Hahaha. Had an argument with my 2 year old in the store today, "That's a dinosaur." "No, it's a dragon." "No, it's a DINOSAUR!" "OK, whatever." Her language skills crack me up, too. Not as fun when she's arguing or insisting, "I help you" or "I do it!"

[21stCenturyMom]

My youngest called me by my first name for a while. It was pretty funny. Now that's she's grown up she calls me Mama. No worries.

[Robin from Israel]

They are too cute. And that photo! Now THAT is a cheeky picture ;-).

I'd provide a cute anecdote of my own here, but the neighbors are doing some kind of renovations and the noise of the drilling has driven me insane and knocked every single coherent thought out of my head.

[Melany aka Supermom]

Yes Tertia three is indeed worse but from there it gets better, so there is hope right?
I too love to hear myself through them...easiest way to really see yourself ;)

[Ute]

Reminds me of my daughter who took away a bowl of crisps from my husband the other day, telling him: "Now that's enough for today, love!" It just cracks me up! :-D

[Ute]

PS: "YOU do it" has become "Mama helfen!!!" in this house. Saskia knows full well that one can hardly refuse to "help" - even though it means that one often ends up doing the required task oneself. *g*

[Cricket]

Although I have a relatively gentle and polite son (to others), he held out all his angst for me, the nonoverbearing disciplinarian single mom. I waited for twos to be over and threes were worse. A friend said to wait for fours, but they were awful - all cheeky, to put it nicely. Fives were good and it felt lovely, then six was bad all over again. Thank goodness seven, eight, and nine have relatively been a breeze. I'm getting lip more lately just past nine and a half, so I fear a change is brewing. I think them learning to talk is over rated.

[Boulder]

Not so funny to whom when "SHIT!" is said?

To me it is hilarious! (Apologies for only being 7 years old myself.)

[Kim]

The story goes that when my (now grown) cousin was little, she was at my grandmother's house doing something. My cousin had speech problems. Maw-Maw dropped a dish, or something, I think, and Shannon looked at her and said, "You didn't say 'chit,' Maw-Maw!"

[Woody's Girl]

ROFL Too funny, T! It's alarming and hysterical, all at once, isn't it? There have been so many moments when I've had to keep myself from laughing, because what my daughter said at the time *really* wasn't appropriate... but SO funny!

Love the Caboose photo. Easy to tell gender, even from the backside. Amazing that the difference is so evident, even with twins!

[Antoinette from SA]

I have a 3 year old daughter and the other day she is standing talking to her teddy bear. The conversation went something like this -
My daughter : "Come teddy, you need to get dressed now otherwise we are going to be late, you know mommy doesn't like to be late and we are now going to hit lots of traffic". I sat watching her with an amusing smile on my face. The next moment she goes and stands in front of the window (which I presume is her mirror) and she starts putting on make-up. It was the most comical thing I have actually sat and watched. Now I know what I look like to her.
They are definitely little mini-me's.

[Orange]

You're entering about a four-year span in which it simply doesn't pay to rebut the child. "Yes, fine, if you insist, it's a bear." Correct them once, then concede the point, because they are far more stubborn than any adult, especially when wrong.

I take comfort in knowing that eventually, the child will learn the facts, and with a little luck he'll remember that his brilliant mother knew it all along.

[Judy]

Conversation at our house yesterday:

Me: Tyler, you are stinky
Tyler: Yes I am! Yes I am!
Me: Let's go change your diaper
Tyler: Let's NOT

Ugh. Get ready.

[KLynn]

At least "shit" isn't as bad as what my 3 year old did the other day. I was chewing out/yelling at my 14 year old daughter for not getting her chores done when I yelled at her to "quit fucking off". Seconds later, my 3 y.o. yells "quit fucking off". Definitely time to start censoring my own mouth...yep, definitely. Yikes.

[Suzie-Q.]

Those truly are the cutest bums!! BTW... if it makes you feel any better mine are saying, "Mommy Fuck!", "Mommy, Fuck!".
Nice.

[Sue]

What's scary is when you find yourself talking like them.
Son grabbing something I don't want him to touch: "Mine!"
Me, grabbing it back: No, MINE! Mommy's. Miiiine!"
Sigh.

[Dawn]

We are living parallel lives

[Stefanie]

Yes, 3 is worse! And 4 - 11 has been no better with my dd. My son is much nicer to me, lol. He's almost 6.

[Jan]

My daughter will be three in a month. Yesterday we had this conversation:

Munchkin: Mommy, why did you take your watch off?
Me: To do dishes.
Munchkin: Mommy, please put your watch back on.
Me: I will in a little bit when I'm done cleaning up the kitchen.
Munchkin: 1 ... 2 ... 3 ... 4 ... 5. Mommy, put you watch on right now.

She's go the details wrong (I only count to 3 and then I do it for her), but the tone, etc was dead on.

Have mercy.

[JennyK]

I hated hearing that three was worse than two. My friend says "Three is two with an extra year of practice and a better vocabulary." She's right, but at least they get funnier, too.

After we ended up undressing our son (almost 2) in our daughter's room, I made the mistake of leaving his small pile of laundry there while I turned off the water for their bath -- our daughter (3 1/2) picked up the clothes, marched into her brother's room, dropped them into HIS laundry hamper and declared, "Does this look like *MY* laundry? I don't think so!"

Where on earth does the attitude come from?

[Amanda]

My daughter's just turned two, but I recognise in her already what you've said about your children. She's so different from my son (now 10), and can be so cheeky at times!! But aren't they just adorable at this age?

[Janis]

I hear you! It's amazing how quickly they become verbal and then how it progresses.

Caleb used to scream for help in the bathroom. No words just grunting and nonsense stuff. Now he yells "Somebody will wipe my butt please!" Livia's patent response is "Wipe your own butt. Don't be lazy!"

They reason, they argue, they insist they are right.

It's even better when they are teenagers. Wait, not better, worse. Hang on to your knickers! HAHAHAHAHA

[Lee]

Three sucks. Period.

My sister-in-law swears to me that on the fourth birthday they become little angels...only 2 months, 28 days, ten hours and 34 seconds to go.

[janet]

no, my friends. you have so much to look forward to -- as long as it's in the ODD-numbered ages. the evens are the killers. if you dont like 2 or 3, wait till you get to 4, which, in my circles, was referred to as the "f**king 4's." heh. have fun (mine are 26, 23, 18, 17 and 12 -- if that gives me any credibility at all!!!!)

[legalmama]

Oh, three is my favorite age. They are so unbelievably cute at three. With their big words and big thoughts filtered through their totally innocent minds.

Are they very very willful at three? Oh, yes. Is there a lot of whining? More than you thought possible.

But it is all absolutely positively worth it. And I'm not speaking from hazy memory. I have twin girls who are 3 years 4 months. And they drive me MAD every day, but also amaze me every day.

Three is the last year that they are totally and absolutely yours. After that, they start giving parts of themselves to the world.

Look forward to it.

[Spacemom]

He he he, I love it when something goes wrong and my 4.75 year old say "Oh dammit all!"

Whoops!
:)

And 3 is worse than 2 and 4 is differently worse than 3...

[Jan]

It's cute at 2, but not so cute when the first word out of their mouths getting out of the van their first day of Kinder is "bullshit"

True.

[Julie]

OMG how cute is that bumbum pic!!!

Guess I need to start censoring my potty mouth now - I can only imagine what my daughters first words will be if I don't!!!

[Wade]

i'm sorry, but those bum pics worry me terribly. what if some perv gets off on them? please don't be offended, i love your blog and have followed it since they were babes, but this style of pic posting concerns me.

[atomic]

My two-year old sat at the dining room table a few nights ago chanting "fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck." No idea where she picked that up.

Fuck.

[girlh]

My sister swears the terrible twos are nuthin' on the effin' fours. Actually F*cking Fours is her word.
And she is a HC too! But there is no other word to describe, so she says.

The picture is priceless. Nice blackmail material for when they are teenagers.
...and who will be laughing then?!

[kristylynne]

All this talk of terrible twos, threes and so forth has me scared. My son is 20 months now, and I swear he hit the terrible twos about six months ago. My, what we have to look forward to!

He now calls our cat "jackass" because I called the cat that one day after he swatted at my son. Sigh. I guess he takes after his aunt, who at age 2 called the principal of her preschool (a priest, no less) a "dickhead."

[Kirby]

I've got no kiddos yet — yeah, that's why I'm here — but a co-worker shared a story:

As her three girls were getting ready for daycare, the driver came to the door and rang. As the mum opened the door, the youngest said: "Hurry up and get down here or you're going to get us all fired from daycare."

Bears resemblance to a snit she once had with the hubby. Loved it.

[Heather]

Ah the language development. I swear Mega went from 1-2 coherent words to complete sentences over night. And yes, the repeated parental phrases MUST be my favorites. He tells his brother to "leave it alone," and such things all the time. He told me the other day that I was being bossy and needed to chill out. *sigh* I can't wait for 3! WOO-HOO!!!

And I think baby bums are okay, just not frontal nudity. F*ck off pervs!

[Julie]

There must be something wrong with me and my kids. *lol* (I have 4 of them)... By 2 1/2 on up, things just got easier and easier... But then, they were never really hard to begin with... *shrugs* My youngest is 3 1/2 right now, and if she starts acting up, all I have to do is give her the "look", and she runs to do my bidding... Work the look. Seriously. *lol*

[angel]

mwaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha! those are hysterical! makes you wanna walk around with a tape recorder!