« What the f*ck? | Main | Community Announcements »


Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

screw grieving and healing. she needs to get whatever brand of assault rifle is handy (m-16, ak-47, uzi, whatever) and have a little talk with the ob. i've never been one to stand on protocol; i prefer to stand on peoples' testicles. grrr.

You are kind to help. I am with you how could you not help.

It's wonderful that women that are in such a bad place have someone so wonderful to talk to.

You are amazing! Take care.

That is just horrible!!! And how negligent can a physician be. What an ass.

My heart breaks for her....

What a sad situation. I applaud you for continuing to offer support for women in this situation. However painful it is, you know how desperately they need the support from somebody who understands. You have a gift for finding appropriate words to share with people in pain, from infertility or the loss of a baby. I am sure you have helped many women, probably more than you realise.
My heart goes out to these parents, and to you and all parents who have lost a baby or a child.

Is there anything I can do to help? Please let me know. I don’t care what people say, I still think loosing a baby is worse than being infertile. It might be different if you spent time with the baby, then you might be willing to trade a few precious weeks or months for being infertile, but to just loose a baby – I think it fucking sucks.

Ohmigawd...I'm speechless.....how shocking...how negligent...arrgh!

More and more I am hearing about gynae's giving terrible advice/care to women in SA. It makes me so angry. I've also started hearing about Paediatricians who seem to have the same type of attitude.

There must be some kind of board to report these negligent idiots to... It's unacceptable that one who has undertaken to study medicine for all that time, who has taken an oath to protect and give the best care possible (not to mention takes your money so quickly and easily) can get away with this. One patient - one baby dies... if we don't do something - how many more will die? Or have died already...

Tertia - love her... You are doing the brave (and right) thing!

T - I'm proud of you.

While you support her we'll support you. It's a wonderful thing you're doing. Thank you for reaching out despite the toll it takes on you. When it gets hard come here and let us know.

You're the best!

I wish you didn't have experience with this type of pain but you rock for helping those that do.

For her to suffer like that and loose a baby because her ob is an idiot, that's just awful.

For you to stick with it and give these women the support they need, that's amazing.

Oh, that poor, poor woman, and that awful, awful OB. Do you have a malpractice litigation system in SA? In the U.S. I'd be referring her to the most ruthless malpractice attorney that I could find, once she felt up to it. Anyone can make a momentary mistake, but that's sustained negligence in the face of multiple warnings and commonly accepted medical practice. Gaaah.

But none of that would make her feel better right now, so I'm mighty glad that she has you. Sniff.

my two cents:
Dear Tertia
Is there really no one else? Maybe not a person like yourself but surely the hospital has support staff - therapists, social workers ... I think it is admirable that you feel compelled to help however if this triggers you about your Ben in a way that is not helpful for you - they will find someone else -maybe not as perfect as your fine self but something else will be arranged. Take Care of your own heart. It isn't selfish.
If you really feel that talking to this person won't be too upsetting then do it - but Jesus woman you have been through enough without having to relive it again and again every time you are asked. Only do this if it is helpful for YOUR grieving process.

Have been reading for a year now - very helpful.

I don't know what to say, except here's to you for stepping up, even when it's painful.

I still occasionally get phone calls from parents with children freshly diagnosed with autism. My heart sinks. I think, jeesus, I'm done with all that, I'm just starting to get my life, my financial wellbeing, and hopefully my marriage back, I don't even want to think about this anymore. But I do what I can, because what else can I do?

But honestly? I'm much less helpful than I was years ago. Somewhere in there, something burned out for good. No matter how good the outcome, the struggle maims a bit.

It is difficult for you as you have to relive your pain.

My mom had a mastectomy, and no-one could understand why she couldn't discuss it with someone else about 10 years later. She hadn't got over it herself, that is why.

No-one will respect you less for NOT contacting her. It is a place you don't want to go. If anyone will understand the new mum will.

Bless you. I am sure that mom really needed you and appreciates you. Poor woman.

The comments to this entry are closed.


  • Medsitters Au pairs

More Ads

| More


Bloggy Stuff

  • Living and Loving

  • SA Blog Awards Badge

  • Featured in Alltop

  • Page copy protected against web site content infringement by Copyscape

  • RSS Feed
Blog powered by Typepad
This is the Reviews Design