News from Karen / Naked Ovary

 

She is fine. Karen is a survivor and thoroughly classy woman.  She is busy processing everything that has happened and will be posting an update soon to let you all know how she is doing.

 

She said to tell everyone that she is so honoured to have your love and support. And that everyone’s emails and messages have made all of this so much easier to deal with.  (You are welcome to leave a supportive note here; I’ll make sure she gets them all.)

 

As I said, she is a classy woman.  She will come out on top.

 

Comments

[Dani]

Thanks so much for the update, Tertia.

Karen - Long time lurker here that has been refreshing obsessively waiting for an update. I hope you sort this out soon.

[Jamie]

Thank you so much, Tertia. I've been worrying.

Karen- I'm heartbroken for you. It's such a shame that someone had to take away your safe place. You do what you need to do.

[jax]

Karen - I'm also a lurker and have been so worried that you've gone offline. Have no idea what has happened but know what a very cruel wait you have been enduring. All will be well Karen, please hang in there.

[Shelley]

Thanks, Tertia.

Karen, I sincerely hope that whoever posted is some jerk who posted what s/he did in order to be a jerk, not because they actually do know you. I try hard to keep an open mind and heart towards others' POV, but to be perfectly honest I find it hard to imagine how anyone could be offended by anything you've posted, regardless of whether they know you personally. I've been reading your blog for years now and love it, and am cheering for you, Mr. Ovary and Maya.

Last winter I was at a hockey game, and there was a family behind me -- a Caucasian mom, dad, grandmother and grandfather, and a darling little Chinese girl of about 7. The way that family interacted was so beautiful -- she is obviously so cherished. I want that for you and for everyone who's waiting. (And, selfishly, I hope to be along for the ride by reading your blog).

Thinking of you.

[Martha Smith]

Karen- Yet another long-time lurker. I'm so very sorry this has happened. I really can't believe someone would say that. It seems like this is one of those occasions when it's really their issue, not yours, yet you're the one who has to deal with it. I'm sending major postive vibes in your direction.

[jax]

I'm confused by what has happened. Has someone posted something crappy on Karen's blog so it was closed down? Sorry that I'm not up to speed

[sara]

What on earth happened? I sub to NakedOvary via bloglines, so I'd assume I'd have an idea what was going on via RSS feed -- but I don't!

Whatever happened, I"m sorry! People can really stink.

[Kay]

Karen - I emailed you, but wanted to comment here too. I'm so sorry you have yet another thing on your plate to "sort out". It's just not fair.

Whoever could be "offended" by you in "real life" is obviously a self-centered twit.

Even if I don't always understand some of the things you say and the feelings you have, I am smart enough to recognize that you are sorting YOUR feelings. You are coming from a place of pain that I have not been. And neither has this "real life" troll.

I wish you well. And I hope you come back soon. I'm having cute clothing picture withdrawal.

The best to you!

[Kay]

Also - thanks Tertia for the update. We have been worried.

[Cricket]

I hope the recovery is quick and complete. She has such balls.

[millie]

Just wanted to send my love to Karen. Like the others, I'm not sure what happened but I'm always rooting for Karen.

[Meg]

Thanks for the post, Tertia. Like many others, i've worried about Karen.

Karen, we miss you!

[Lila]

I wrote Karen a mail after I found her note why she takes time off. Well, even if some stupid person did not understand what an anonymous blog is for... and took PERSONALLY what Karen wrote... and even felt HURT by it... she should grow up!

Karen has prevented so much hurt and unintended insult and assvice/stupid questions/adoption illiteracy over the years. This is much more important than a petty feeling of insult about Karen's honesty.

Karen's blog is one of the best around. She is an articulate, warm, sensitive person and even in bloglife, a real educator. She educated me, for sure. I admire her and I can't understand how anyone could think otherwise.

I'll be glad to see her bounce back. And another thing I told her: she simply CAN'T deprive us of the moment when Maya comes home. She CAN'T do that to her readers!!!!

[EJW]

Karen, I've been reading The Naked Ovary for a long time, and I dearly hope that you decide to come back. Your writing is honest, touching, and funny, and it will be a huge loss to the IF/adoption blogging world if you stop. I'm secretly more anxious to hear about Maya Payaya than some babies/moms I know in real life!

Maybe it's obvious to me, but a blog is like a diary. If someone doesn't like what they read in it, they should stop reading. It's *your* space to vent and rant and bitch and moan and laugh and cry. Other people's feelings are not part of the equation.

I'm sure the situation is more complicated than that, but I hope that everything works out and that you are back up and running soon.

[Melissa]

Karen,
I've been reading the ovary for, well, forever now! I was so saddened when I went to your site. I don't know if this person is being a cow, or is genuinely upset (though not sure why she should be), and don't want to get all judgemental. But I hope that it is sorted soon, and you can come back to us. I miss you sooo much. Hope you're ok.

Oh, yeah. Hi Tertia! ;)

[Dallas]

Karen HAS to come back... I feel so emotionally invested... I MUST know when little Maya comes home to her!!!

[Meri-ann]

Thanks for the update Tertia.

Karen, I truly hope that all this is sorted out and whoever has caused you this grief butts out and sods off. Your blog is YOURS, not theirs to judge- can't wait for you to come back.... x

[electriclady]

Tertia, thank you so much for the update. It will be such a huge loss for the blogging world if some !@%$ makes Karen feel that it is not safe for her here anymore.

[deborah]

WHAT THE?!?!?

Karen dear, you fucking rock. And rock on, you will.

[Anne]

What the hell happened? I am only now returning to the computer after four weeks in adopting in Ethiopia and two weeks of adjusting to life with our two new babies (A.K.A. trying [unsuccessfully] to find my ass with both hands) and I was crushed that Karen was gone. I've been reading The Naked Ovary for a million years now.

Will someone please fill me in on what happened?

And, Karen, I'm sorry someone hurt you. People suck.

[erica]

I've been so worried, thank you for the update, Tertia.

Karen, 99.9999999% of the world LOVES YOU!!! Remember that, please! We LURVE you.

erica

[Pink]

Tertia, thanks for the update on Karen. I guess I missed something because I didn't know why her site was down.

Karen, anyone who is offended by something you wrote is an ass. Nobody forces a blog down someone's throat, if you don't like it, don't read it. Please hang in there and know how many of us care.

[Sarah]

Thanks for the update. I have no idea what happened, but I'm distressed nonetheless. Tell Karen that I miss her!!!!

[ceecee]

Could someone please explain what happened? I have no idea.

Karen, I'm sorry that you've been through rough times.

[daysgoby]

I sent karen a note (although she doesn't know me from a hole in the wall - is that nice or disquieting to have strangers say they wish you well??) I hope she can find a (possibly new? Tertia, you'd post a new blog address for her if she needed one, right?) place to be happy, and centered, and free again.

[jenny]

Karen - I am so sorry that your place of solice has been disturbed. I've been lurking on your blog for a while and I love reading the thoughts you share with us. I hope you come back soon. blog world is missing you! xoxo

[Shandra]

Karen, I have no idea what happened but come baaack! I not only really enjoy reading your posts, it's made me ten times as aware of how to be more thoughtful with parents who are adopting than I had been. And I wish I had your email 'cause I have a book for you and MP and now I have no address to ask for an address! It was in lieu of quilt square but I've been slooooow about it. :-)

[Sheri Guyse]

In case anyone else is having this problem, this link doesn't seem to work:

http://thenakedovary.typepad.com/the_naked_ovary/

But this one does:

http://thenakedovary.typepad.com/

[VanillaDreams]

Tertia, thanks so much for posting an update about Karen. I have been thinking about her and checking her blog frequently.

I missed the post from the person who said they know Karen in "real, work life", and the comments and all of the ones that followed were taken down, so I really don't know what was said. But, from the sounds of it, it sounds like a horribly immature person to accuse Karen of insulting "him/her." I can't believe someone would have the nerve to say that to her!! I have read Karen's blog for the last nearly two years, and I've NEVER read anything that I felt could me remotely miscontrued into being hurtful to anyone! Besides, a blog is someone's personal journal, and if one can't post their feelings there, where can they?!?!

Karen, I'm so sorry this has happened to you, and I hope you can get this sorted out, and get back to your writing. You are such a talented writer and great person, I would really miss reading it. Your blog is one of the few that make me feel a little better when I am feeling sad about my own infertility nightmares. I really wish you all the best, and hope things resolve for you soon, and look forward to hearing when you bring your daughter home. Take care of yourself!!

[Kay]

And, she's back! Yay!

[Bridgette]

Thanks so much for the update. I was really worried about her.

[candace]

I am so glad to see Karen back - and on a related topic - does anyone know how getupgrrl is doing or if she has a new blog? I have been checking chez miscarriage and hoping to see the next bloggy idea forever!

[Amyin BC]

I am so glad to hear Karen is ok. Not being able to check her blog has been very worriesome to say the least. One has to wonder what has happened for her deny access to her blog. So many care for her and want to know what is happening in her journey, myself included of course..

[Schnozz]

I echo the query on getupgrrl. That big bloggy line has been ... well ... let's just say it's sort of been taunting me lately. And baring its teeth at me. And laughing in my face about how SHE WILL NEVER POST AGAIN, IT'S ALL A TRICK, SUCKER, AND YOU KEEP FALLING FOR IT AND GETUPGRRL IS LAUGHING AT YOU.

I don't like it. Answers? Anyone. I keep promising myself I'll just stop checking, but ... well.

[jodie]

For those who can't be bothered chasing it up but want to know, basically someone in Karen's "real life" from her work found out she was blogging and started reading. She commented about being upset by some of Karen's comments relating to her feelings about friends being pregnant. There were, of course, some retaliatory posts. Now Karen has to run a censored blog, bearing in mind that people in real life might be reading it and might take things the wrong way. She calls it her "G Rated" Naked Ovary.

I think the problem with blogs that become so popular is that this exact thing happens, and it's happened to Tertia too. She's recently removed a few posts - and absolutely fair enough, her right. The bloggers are no longer able to post about anything and everything with absolute candidness, the stuff we love reading, because there are people out there who might take things badly, might be offended, or it might change their opinions of the blogger "in real life". It's such a shame, and it seems to be able to blog in an open and frank way you have to be anonymous. I do love that T has many "real life" friends and family reading her pieces and think she's really brave - esp the cooter talk!!!

Poor Karen, I am so sorry this happened, it must have rocked her world. She will now be worried about everything she said in the past, and will worry about everything she now wants to say. I wonder if the work colleague who posted feels a little bad for not contacting her in private about it? I would feel terrible.

[Jodie]

When I said retaliatory posts, I meant comments - Karen has been nothing but mature, lovely and sensitive about it all.

[gkk]

Hi Tertia

Thanks for posting this, I wanted to email Karen but she probably doesn't know me from Adam and I wasn't sure if I should.

This whole situation makes me so mad, the whole "I don't like the way YOU choose to deal with the most traumatic experience of YOUR life". Sheesh, read if you have to but at your own risk, Karen's blog is about helping Karen get through a hard time. Some people need to get over themselves IMO. Phew, I feel better now I've got that out LOL.

[thalia]

Funny, that's exactly why I came here, to see if there was news of Karen. Karen, I'm sorry that this shitty stuff is happening to you right now. I hope you find a way back soon. In the meantime, clearly a lot of people are thinking about you!

[Menita]

Karen, what happened to you really, really, really sucks. Glad you're back - but have to comment here as your comment feature is off ; )

[kate]

Karen, I really hope that the fact that someone who wouldn't know you from Adam, is sitting in her study in Australia being totally consumed by angst about the MP wait, and about how someone could be so crappy to you.... well I really hope that helps just a bit.

[sheilah]

Thank you, Tertia for the O update. I have commented a few times on Karen's blog so I may not be entirely a stranger (tho' she gets so many comments I may fall into the vast wasteland of "who the hell...??!").

I am sorry, Karen, that someone has felt upset by what you write. He/she obviously doesn't understand that what you write are your FEELINGS which you cannot entirely control. As so many have said that if this person doesn't like what you write then they should just cease reading.

[spit]

I'm sorry that happened to Karen. Anyone who really read her blog could have nothing but love and good wishes for her.

[AnaBell]

Karen: I'n sorry for what happened to you and I'm sorry you had to give up your blog because you made clear it helped you a lot to sort out a lot of stuff. And I'm sorry because I've lost one of my favorite blogs. I just want to tell you that you opened my eyes to a lot of things I knew nothing about but still had the nerve to pass a judgment. So I thank you for making me more open to other people situation and I wish you and your family all the best.

[Scout]

Thanks for the update on Karen. I came back from vacation and was worried. I hope she gets things up and running again.

[Kara]

The commenter above who called Karen an educator is spot-on. Karen is like a great episode of Zoom or Sesame Street or The Electric Company - you have so much fun and get so wrapped up in the story, and then next thing you know you've learned to read!

Because of Karen, I have stopped saying so many stupid things that I didn't even know were stupid when I originally said them ("child of her own", which I now realize is so, so dumb, and other stuff like that). She has opened my eyes to a whole different, wonderful world.

I hope she can find a way to make those archives accessible, because whether it is a personal exploration or not, what she is saying is important and is making a difference in people's lives. Maybe she doesn't want that responsibility, which is fine, but that's her choice to make, and someone else doesn't have the right to take it away from her.

[VanillaDreams]

Okay, I'm really confused now -- went to check on Karen's blog today, and now ALL the comments are gone? I thought when I read yesterday there was over 150 comments to her most recent post (which she was moderating, understandably) -- and she has now turned them off? Did I miss something again??

I don't know where else to post my question -- but does anyone know what's going on?

[Karen]

Ah, I love all of you so so much.

Vanilladreams, I had to turn them off. I had to moderate so many of them--lots of angry and feisty, which is totally understandable and believe me, um, yeah. So finally it just got too much. I figured no comments was better than me editing every single one so that nobody would get upset.

This whole thing is so stinky I can't even begin to fathom all of its stinktetood.

[VanillaDreams]

Karen,

Thanks so much for responding! I totally understand -- I was just worried that something else had happened to you! And I had hoped not! So, again, I'm sorry that you are having to go through all this, but glad that you are able to move forward from it at least.

I will keep checking your blog for future updates! :) Take care of yourself!!

Vanilladreams