B update

I know you have all dying to know how the B’s are doing, so here is a quick B update.

 

Firstly, I’ve decided to grow my hair for winter. Keeping things warm etc.

 

Actually, I just can’t bare the thought of more pain. So no more bald cooter, at least for the winter. Crew cut and regular maintenance, but no hot wax.

 

Then, re the book. LOTS of potentially v exciting things happening, that I don’t want to mention yet, for fear of jinxing things. But, things are happening. I also had my first independent review and it was v positive. Am on top of the world at the moment. Maybe the book isn’t so crap after all.

 

Botox: think will reward self for positive book review with Botox splurge. Apparently diets of bread and water are all the rage. 

 

Boobs: no news. The boob ‘b’ was just a space-filler anyway. Don’t really care either way. Marko and I aren’t ‘boob people’.

 

But the most exciting B at the moment is my braces!!! They are coming off in (hopefully) 6 weeks time, wooooooo hooooooooooo! Can’t flipping wait! So damn excited. The first thing I am going to do is run my tongue over my teeth for about an hour or so, savouring the deliciously smooth feel and lack of razor sharp metal, and then I am going to brush my teeth for about three days solid. Even though I spend ages brushing and flossing my teeth everyday, since getting braces they have never felt completely clean. CAN’T WAIT!

 

So, that is how the B’s are doing. I am soon going to have significantly less metal, comparatively more hair and a soupçon of Botulinum toxin type A floating around my body.

 

I am going to do a new poll soon, with four HOT guys for you to choose from. To make up for that appalling set I gave you yesterday.  Sorry about that, but you did need to be punished for your disobedience.

 

 

Comments

[Jodie Buckland]

Consider us duly punished. I mean, UGH!

A warning about the braces, your teeth will feel absolutely weird and slimy for a day or two! How fantastic that they are coming off already. You've motivated me to get my teeth done.

Fab news about the book! As for the botox, I'm not just blowing smoke up your arse, you really don't need it.

Very grateful for the cooter update. Been going through massive cooter withdrawal. Er, so to speak.

[Lynnette]

I am sooooooooooooo jealous! You know I'm stuck with mine for another 2 years, at least! This new guy can't even promise to fix my overbite, which happened after the braces! WTF? Great news about the book! Can't wait to add it to my South African book collection...no wonder my luggage was so heavy...BTW, thanks for the posts. I think I might have to kiss your ass, since you predicted it!

[Lucy]

Advice for after the braces come off:

When they take impressions of your teeth for your retainers, have them do a set of bleaching trays at the same time. No matter how meticulous you are while the braces are on, you are definitely going to want to do some bleaching when those things finally come off. (I got mine off about four years ago, after 2 years and jaw surgery ... aah, sweet sweet relief when they came off ... it was a beautiful thing.) Congrats!!

[Kim]

Me thinks you've been fantasizing about Mr A cos you sound a lot like mummy, telling us off like that - you naughty thing you.

[Kestrel]

I remember when I got my braces off, it was the best! Feeling those smooth teeth and eating gummy stuff. The only weird part was that my lips felt way too big for my mouth, if that makes sense.

[Photographer Lori]

Your lips are going to feel like they are slipping and sliding all over you teeth when the braces come off...it's the coolest feeling!

[Leggy]

So jealous on the braces front- I still have another 4-6 months to go on mine.

[projgen]

Yay! Congratulations on the first great review!

And yeah, I second (third, fourth?) the smooth teeth thing - I ran my tongue over my teeth non-stop for days. At least that's how it felt!

[Kez]

So if your boobs aren't going to be updated in your B posts, can we switch it to how Rose's boobs are going?

Love to know how she's going, and how her life has changed.