Files from the Asshole Archives

 

You wanted to know some of the other reasons why I am an asshole? Here are a few.

 

Proof that I am an asshole: Reason #5

 When I know I am in financial trouble, I don’t look at my bank accounts.  As if not knowing my bank balance makes things better.

 

Proof that I am an asshole: Reason #10

 When I discover a new fave food or dish, I will eat it every night until I am sick of it. Then I will never eat it again. I hate it when I do that. 

 

Proof that I am an asshole: Reason #12

 I am the world’s worst procrastinator.  I will put things off until they become urgent.  But putting them off doesn’t make me feel better, it just stresses me out even more.  I still do it.

 

Proof that I am an asshole: Reason #17

 I pick and squeeze on my face even though I know it will leave a scar.  And every time I do it I am sorry afterwards.

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Hahahaha!!!  Have to share this with you.  I use ‘Clusty’ to search my blog for previous posts that I want to link to – you can see the search box on my sidebar.  I prefer it to the Technorati search functionality. Clusty groups together different topics for the search you entered.  Anyhow, I knew the post I wanted to reference had ‘asshole’ in the title do I did a search on “asshole”.  Look what came up as the top associated topic – “Julie”.  Proof!! She is an asshole, even Clusty.com says so!!

 

 

Comments

[Dani]

I can relate to all of them.

::Sigh::

V, v funny about the Julie=Asshole thing. LOL!

[Amanda Lynn]

I'm very #5. And I have 3 overdue library books on my desk, waiting to be returned - but I ignore them (atleast I haven't tucked them under the desk so I 'forget' about them - yet!)

[baseballmom]

Definitely can relate to #5...I even throw the ATM receipt out before looking at it, because I don't want to see the balance.Too scary!

[SheilaC]

I would comment to tell you what a procrastinator I am, but I have some other stuff I have to do first... Ha. Reading blogs is how I procrastinate doing other "important" things.
Do you ever make a To Do list, and then not look at the list for a couple of weeks? Well it's one way to avoid thinking about undesirable tasks.

[Timi]

I'm all over #5 and #12 as well. It's rediculous and there's nothing I can do about it.

[Lindsey]

Ha! Every single reason you are an asshole, I am one too!

Must be why I like reading your blog so much!

[Boulder]

We could seriously be the same person, except for the opposite ends of the earth thingy....

No wonder we find each other so marvelous!

xoxo

[H.A. Page]

Thanks for the clusty tip... great tool for bloggers!
Cheers!

[Angie]

OMG I do that bank thing, too! It's like I'm afraid to look because I don't want the bad news.

I do the zit thing, also, which is currently worse than usual as it seems I'm going through puberty at 35.

[kelly]

I do all but the food thing, I'm kind of protective of my favorite foods, and like to dish them out to myself in small doses. That might be an asshole behavior too, though.

[Judy]

Oh #12, #12, #12 -- why do you think I am sitting here replying to your entry?

[Bristol Girl]

Oh Good Grief. I do ALL of those. Burying my head in the sand is my favourite pastime.

[MamaChristy]

"Technorati search functionality"

Isn't this something out of the DaVinci Code?

[victoria]

If those flaws make you an asshole, then we are all assholes.

[Andrea]

What fascinates me is that asshole reason #'s 5, 10, 12, and 17 apply to me too. I do #5 for both financial trouble and weight trouble. If I know I've gained some weight, I don't get on the scale. I recently discovered medjool dates. I probably ate 250 them in a 6 month period, and now I never want to see them again. I thought about writing a comment to your post last night but I didn't get around to it until this morning. I am sitting here fiddling with some occlusion on my face whilst reading your post.

Scary.

[jenny]

Dammit, I guess I am an asshole. I do all of them except for #10. I don't think I could ever get sick of any food. #5 is good, bet we all thought we were the only one that did that.

[Firefoxer]

Why not use the 'tab' function in firefox instead of having 11 firefox windows open. You could view your whole blogroll in tabs in ONE firefox window!

[Kara]

Yup, Jenny, I thought I was the only one that ever did #5. Yet another benefit of reading T.

[projgen]

Yep, #5 and #12 for me, too. Funny, though, it's only when things are bad (um, like now). When I'm flush, I am totally anal about my bank statements and paying bills.

But I'm so not with you on the food thing! I can eat the same fave food every day for years. YEARS.

[Susy]

Hey--your #s 17 and 10 are the same as my #s 7 and 12! I thought I had gone through all the proper patenting and copyrighting channels and paid many lawyers tons of lousy American dollars to keep my assholiness holy, but my, you are SNEAKY!

[kris]

Ha! I do all of the above as well. I recently had a picking fit--and now I look like shit--Again--After over 20 years of breakouts, you think I'd learn! I am such an asshole!

[kris]

Reason #50 that I am an asshole--I can't type or proofread--that should say *you would* think I'd learn. Yikes!

[Lisa]

I do all of the exact same things so dont feel bad we are all assholes!!!