Miscellaneous

Well, I’ve created a monster haven’t I?  Worst thing I could do was to ask you to talk  about you.  I see it is clearly a subject close to your heart.  Nothing like the opportunity to talk about yourself to get you out of lurkdom.

Seriously, thank you very much. I am blown away by the response, by your compliments and how many people are actually reading the shit I write.  I almost get stage fright just thinking about it.  So many people to unwittingly offend. 

On that note:  Please could we make a deal that we will all keep our sense of humour around here and be able to laugh at ourselves.  If I have to be PC about every one’s sensibilities I will end up saying nothing.  So darling lesbian readers (lord, am I ever flattered to have so many lesbian readers, I feel so cosmopolitan) forgive me for the short fingernail crack.  If I didn’t like men so much (don’t ask me why, I know they are simple creatures.  Perhaps that’s their appeal?) I could see myself as a lesbian, because I just love women, we clearly are the superior sex.  Although a close encounter with Lloyd* might make any woman question their sexual orientation.  He is just such a winner.

And Bush voters – just teasing.  Hey, it’s your country, vote for who ever you want.

You are allowed to make as many SA / Tertia jokes as you want.

Then, another thought from the survey.  I am so impressed at the number of non-infertile people there are reading infertile blogs.  I wish I had known there were so many caring people out there when I was going through my trials.  I think you are wonderful for immersing yourself in this world.  Thank you.

*As much as I hate to give trolls any publicity, I had to share this with you, it’s a classic.  (Posted on the discussion on circumcision.)  Good ole Lloyd manages to piss several groups of people off at once.  This guy is good! 

A new comment has been posted on your blog So Close, on the post The Controversial Cut.

http://tertia.typepad.com/so_close/2004/12/the_controversi.html

IP Address: xxxxx (I’ve taken this out to protect poor Lloyd)
Name: Lloyd Chapman.
Email Address: [email protected]
URL:
Comments:

this has to be the stupidest bunch of nuts. get off of little boys penises, leave this web site and get diner ready for your husband,that is probly cut too.
you all say this is WRONG when i read that some of you ladies are shacking up with your partner is also female???   oh yea! this is a moral bunch we have here.

 
Smooch darling Lloyd!  Wanna watch?

Don’t send poor Lloyd hate mail, let’s just laugh and point instead.  Poor Lloyd.  I think his Mommy was not too nice to our Lloyd, and now he has Issues.

He’s a gem, our Lloyd. 

Comments

[Expat]

Dear Lloyd, the poor thing - it's not his fault he was dropped on his head as a child.

I love a troll who's too silly to even get annoyed about.

And all your fertile readers? That because we infertiles have been out spreading the word.

[Bridgette]

"Smooch darling Lloyd! Wanna watch?"

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Thanks for the laugh T!

[LisaV]

Tertia, I am so sorry for Lloyd, obviously his circ left him without the ability to spell check.

You are always witty and thoughtful and don't let anyone tell you any different.

[Kay]

I'm a fertile Bush voter. I love reading you and wish you all the best.

[Brandy]

Poor Guy!!! He really does not have a clue. I bet he doesn't have a wife.

[Magnolia]

I'm not infertile (though I thought I was) and I read all of you religiously..and so does my single non infertile roommate

We very much squealed and high fived each other when Adam and Kate were born..with tears and everything

And Lloyd? my husband does the cooking here..

You can thank me girls when he keels over with a heartattack

[Shevon]

I'm not Lloyd, but can *I* watch??
;)

[Erin]

Just a thought, but I'm guessing all of your readers wouldn't read you if you offended them. So forget the PC stuff and blog away!

[Rebecca]

Tell you what... if you go and get all "PC" on us, chances are you'll scare us all away! Like many of us said, it's your honesty that endears you to us.

That and some of us like being called "assholes" from time to time... just so we remember our place! :)

[kat]

Wonder where Lloyd came from?

[JenL]

Can I just say that I lurve you, Tertia baby!

Fertile hetero with longish fingernails here and STILL I love ya.

Lloyd makes me laugh. Tiny Tiny man.

[LizM]

Poor poor Lloyd. All I can picture is some some hick guy wearing overalls and chewing on a piece of hay saying "Where's my dinner, Woman?"
Maybe we should feel bad for Lloyd's wife (if there is one). Obviously it's not a same sex partner :-)

[susan]

When I first read Kay's comment I thought she said, "I'm a fertile bush lover." I thought she wanted us to know that a fertile lesbian supports you. Then I re-read it correctly. Wasn't nearly as much fun.

Anyway, I need to go now. I apparently have to brush up on my reading skills.

Oh, and Lloyd? Git yer candy ass back in the kitchen and make mah dinner, bitch! Don't let me catch yew a readin agin! Fucking Nancyboy.

[Melani]

Please don't get PC on us!! If I got offended every time someone made a crack about us Bush voters I wouldn't get to read anyone's blogs. I love the fact that we all have such different views. Makes life interesting...

[Cricket]

I have short lesbian fingernails. Maybe I should drop my boyfriend and finally come out. I don't really know if I'm kidding in the least. Never figured out the conversion factor, I think.

[Becki]

Lloyd, you perv, you pretend to be disgusted by Tertia and her entourage, but you obviously can't stop reading, can you?

BTW, my darling hubby forgot to put away last night's casserole after he ate, the remains of which were intended for tonight's dinner. So he can get his own bloody supper. I'm eating Girl Scout cookies.

[Devon]

As one of your illustrious lesbian readers, I forgave you instantly for the fingernail crack. ;)

[shaunacat]

If you were PC, you wouldn't be funny. :o) Lloyd can go back to the barn now and do what he was, um, doing before. ;o)

Love,

A fertile (AND currently knocked up!)
George Bush loving
lesbian admiring
long fingernail wearing
Texan

Yeehaw. ;o)

[Kay]

Susan - I've never tried being a lesbian. Although I have a feeling my husband would like to watch!

[Cadi the confused]

How on Earth do people like Lloyd find their way here? *sigh* Stupidity is rampant in this world, I suppose. Hang in there, Tertia!

[MollieBee]

Kat-

I think Lloyd came from the same place as the dump I just took.

[Louise]

Wonder if Lloyd did a search on "penises" or "circumcision"... Tertia, don't worry about being PC, we get enough of that from the government, love your blogs :)

[Leggy]

Please keep up the Bush comments (along with lesbians, circumcision, etc.) I want the 51% to realize what the world thinks of us now. (Oh, I am so getting flamed now.)

[nita]

wandered over here via 'why did/do you want kids'.

as for Lloyd; ironic that with his spelling skills he has one of the tougher names to spell.....mean mom. but she couldn't have known he'd grow up to be such a dumbass.

[m]

Would love to know what search brought Lloyd to your site. Was it....women smooching women? Love your posts!

[Susy]

I like the fact that he wants you to make "diner" for your husband. Is he suggesting that you build your own restaurant and start your own business? Doesn't he realize that this would leave no time for you to keep US entertained?

OK. I've sent Lloyd the following email, because I just can't WAIT to see what he says:

"Hi Lloyd,

I LOVE your suggestion that Tertia make a diner for her husband! I really think that she has a lot of untapped construction and entrepreneurial talents, as well as being a great chef!

What made you think of that? It's brilliant. I think the whole "diner" concept would be a big hit in South Africa as it is in America. Sort of shabby-chic or some such."

[Zoie]

I think we should all keep Lloyd and his small pee pee in our prayers. I think he may be single

[patricia]

He's a close to illiterate gem. I always wonder - why are they reading this blog anyways?

[Kristin]

Why is it that when I read Lloyd's comment I hear the music from Deliverance? Scary, isn't it.

PLease promise me you won't ever go PC? That would ruin one of the best reads of my day (even if I am a Bush voter...ROFL).

[Neety]

Oh, the poor little thing!
He must have been upset!
Is that because he is still upset that mummy said "no more breastfeeding once you turn 50", and his birthday is coming up?
Poor baby...oh well, back in the closet Lloydy, good boy.

[S]

I am a young, fertility-yet-to-be-determined Bush-hater, since that wasn't one of your survey questions. I don't remember what answer I gave before, but now that I think about it, I have no idea why I check here so regularly. You just must be THAT good!

[Neety]

Oh my god Susy, your comment just had me in tears.
That's the funniest email ever. I can't wait until he reads it.
Of course he won't get it.
"What? Diner? Yeee bitch, that's what me ma makes me every night after I'm back from the farm. What? No, I didn't make love to the sheepy again damn you, no..."

[nance]

Cook? Vat is dis cook of vhich he speaks?

Seriously, I lactate, my husband cooks. Seems a fairly even trade to me.

[Sara]

I forget if I mentioned my woman-loving-ways in my comment, but you can count me as another lesbian who loved the fingernail comment! (I'm single, but I have to keep my nails short for medical school anyway. It simply won't do to gouge a patient's eye out with a talon.)

[andrea]

Ahh Lloyd, he's a keeper!

[katie]

This just proves that old adage that men's brains are in their....well, you know. His obviously was cut a wee much. I said wee. Hahahahaha!

[Emily]

Tertia, you own a 'diner'? Really, where do you find the time -- babies AND making 'diner' for your husband. Oh, Lloyd meant 'dinner'. Well that's probably why someone doesn't get him any, he's not asking for the right thing.

[Rachel]

Of course you should say what you like, PC be damned! I hate PC. Truly! I promise not to get offended, unless you say my babies are ugly :).

Do short fingernails make you gay? My husband will be so horrified! :) I tried long ones for about six months once, way too much work for me. Maybe short fingernails just mean I'm lazy.

[Maia]

Yep, short fingernails = laziness ;)
Did not do the survey but enjoy reading your blog. Have no idea how I started reading you but do enjoy it as a mom to now 7 year old twin girls and a son of 12. I am 38, live in BC Canada and work with the disabled. Also interesting to hear about your part of the world and the differences.

[Julie C.]

Damn, I think Lloyd was talking about me.

I'm semi-fertile and there's no way in hell I'd ever vote for Bush, any Bush.

[2mommies]

I'm another lesbian, with short nails, who laughed aloud when you wrote your nail comment. we'll soon find out if I'm a 'fertile bush lover'...it's great to have 2 wombs to choose from. this time it's my turn to get pregnant.

[Jan]

Posting this here cos it's relevant to Lloyd in one place!

1. What do we have in common? Infertility? Motherhood? Being gorgeous and divine? All of the above?

Yes all the above - multiple IVFs (8 in my case), PTL, NICU, twins.

2. How did you find me?

Through friend.

3. Do you comment? If yes, thanks! If no, how come you don’t?

Sometimes yes.

4. What aspects of my blog (if any) do you enjoy?

Your honest approach, the non-PC bits and the bits I can relate to (hmm, that's most of it).

5. What do you wish our conversations were more about?

Love what you're doing but would like to also read about:
- Marko's views as a Dad (I mean, from your perspective, how you think it has affected him, your relationship etc)
- how IF affects how you are as a mother (eg does it make you more paranoid about losing them, enjoy them more than a "normal" person would etc.... ) - cos it would interest me to read about this since it HAS affected me greatly I think
- how you deal with your IF friends who have not got a baby yet
- any tips/advice YOU have! Isn't it amazing how you (I mean "one" not you personally) go from being totally ignorant as a mother to dishing out advice to others!

6. What do you wish I would shut up about?

- I wish you wouldn't give prominence to jerks who write rude things. If they want to be nasty, I would personally prefer to see you just ignore them so they don't get the satisfaction of knowing they have made an impact in any way. It's worse for them to be completely ignored and get no reaction.

7. I am fascinated by all the different places we are from. Where are you from?

- A Brit living in Hong Kong

8. Lastly, any tips, suggestions, adorations or pieces of assvice?

- Scared of sounding smug here, but I got my twins to sleep through the night by 8 weeks corrected age - and would love to share with you how - but is too longwinded for this post. Email me if you are at all interested. I really am not a know-it-all, just happened to get lucky and find something that works - but I would love to see you get more sleep!