Study finds bottle-feeding causes itchiness

An extensive study (n = 1) has found that bottle-feeding causes facial itchiness (p = 0.01). 

As soon as you start the bottle feed, some thing on your face will itch / need rubbing - your eyes, nose, scalp etc.  Without fail.

There are two ways of dealing with this (ignoring the itch is impossible, the itch is in the magnitude of ‘fucking itchy’, which is v v itchy.)

The first method sees you break the flow to eject the bottle and scratch.  This method is known as premature ejectulation.  I don’t like this method as often it is v difficult to get going / sucking again.

The second method, the one I use, is to tough it out and wait for the burp break.  It is actually quite comical to observe.  You see us sitting serenely having a feed, then I will take the bottle out, lean the babe against my chest (thus freeing a hand) and then a few seconds of frantic, manic scratching and rubbing will ensue.  This will also involve preventative rubbing.  I.e. rubbing of facial parts not yet itchy, but with a high likelihood of being itchy the minute you insert the bottle backing the waiting mouth.

Researchers are investigating a link between bottle-feeding and freshly applied nail polish as the same phenomenon seems to occur then as well.

(02:00 am.  Kate awake and in arms.)

Comments

[kat]

LOL when can we expect to see a paper in the journals about this?

[Kinneret]

It's the same thing that happens when I put on sterile gloves and need to do patient care!! Immediate itchiness of the face/nose, etc.

It's not just for babies anymore :)

[Scully]

Yep, same mysterious occurrence whenever I put on rubber gloves and stick my hand in the toilet to clean it.

It's 5:40 p.m. here.

[VHMPrincess]

Darling! Don't you know you're supposed to put them down to sleep at night? What are you thinking, having Kate up playing and partying??!! ;-)

[Kristine]

Funny!! Did you know that nursing a baby will make your phone ring?

[Lily]

third method-

Use your chin to balance the bottle in the baby's mouth for a moment while you scratch. Or, for the less germ-conscious moms, use your mouth to hold the end up.

[Marlen]

I think the same kind of itching occurs during haircuts, too. I really enjoy reading your blog and wanted to send ((hugs)), prayers and hang in theres for you and the twins! You are doing great!

[Terri]

What I never figured out is why every time I tried to burp one of my kids, I belched like a drunk sailer. WTF???

[Meriel]

istill get a kick and big smile to hear you blogging with one babe in arms another in bed. mother tertia, mother mother tertia. x

[Laura K.]

I always tried the "bring the chin down and use it to hold the bottle still while scratching your face" method - sometimes it worked, and sometimes it went horribly wrong! :)

Laura

[Heather]

Or my favorite: the phone always rings when you start cleaning up the messiest diaper ever!!!!

[Celeste]

LOL!!! The first time my sister fed my daughter, she told me I was using the wrong kind of bottles. I had Avent. She said, no what you need are those Playtex Nursers where the bottle has no bottom and the formula goes in a plastic baggie--then it makes it easy to hold the bottle in place with your teeth or your chin while you free up a hand to scratch or do something else!

Gosh, my face is itchy just thinking back to bottlefeeding days! LOL!!!

[Lisa]

I think you should also look at the link between bottle feeding and phone across the room ringing, or remote across the room and bad tv, and dog barking, and doorbell ringing.

You are going to be a busy girl now, let us know what you find. Look forward to your article.

[Julie C.]

If it's any consolation, breastfeeding has the same effect.

[Susy]

Interesting. I never had that experience but I will keep my eyes and ears open to see if your research has universal implications.

Here's an interesting conclusion I came to during my daughter's early infancy: Having evening dinner plans causes the infant do projectile poo during the final diaper change (you know, the one you do just before you go out the door in hopes that you won't have to do any diaper changes in a public restroom). I don't know if this result is repeatable, but be warned.

[Angie]

Breastfeeding makes the doorbell ring!

[Sarah]

Sitting down to feed the baby also makes you have to pee. Even if you just peed 30 seconds ago. Also you will be thirsty. And it makes the tv remote transport to just out of reach, along with your book and/or magazine.

[cursingmama]

I was going to tell you the same things that Lilly, Angie and Sarah did. I'm convinced that if they didn't come so cute and wonderfully smelling (well mostly) we would send them all back.

[projgen]

Ah, I'm not yet a mother (although we're working REEEAL hard at it), but when I babysit for friends, I suffer the same results. I have found that bringing my head down to my hand and vigorously rubbing the the offending itchy spot againstthe back of my wrist/base of thumb usually does the trick.

Takes a little practice to not jerk the bottle back and forth while executing said motion, thereby popping the little sucker out of the human little sucker's mouth. And we all know you don't want THAT! ;)

[Simone]

You're tops.

[Annalucia]

C'mon guys, this is too easy. You scratch your nose by leaning over and rubbing your nose against your shoulder - preferably the one on the baby arm (that is, if you're holding the baby in your left arm, rub against the left shoulder). You will have to shift the baby only slightly and the bottle hand will keep up with it easily.