I read an article recently that made me smile a wry smile because the parent the person was writing about was me!
The article was called "Losing’s a lesson so ditch the kid gloves" by Chris Dyson. In the article he speaks about how many parents today try to shield their children from losing by giving everyone a turn to be the winner. And that is me! I often used to say to the twins "everyone gets a chance to be the winner" but it looks like I am not doing my children any favours. And yes, all the parties we go to today have a gift for each child in the layers of the parcel in 'pass the parcel'. Heaven forbid the losing children would feel sad about not winning the prize.
The article came at a good time because I have been wondering how to teach Adam how to be a better loser - he is a terrible loser! He has to win all the time and gets terribly upset if he doesn't win. Up until recently it wasn't such a big deal because he always used to win against Kate (she is not sporty or competitive, he is physically stronger than her) and to keep the peace, I used to let him win against me but as he starts mixing with kids bigger and better than him, he is finding is harder to accept defeat graciously.
I played basket ball against him the other day and I decided not to let him win and he was SO upset with me. He acted like a real spoilt brat! After first trying to hurt me by pushing me out the way to score a point, he then burst into tears and stomped off. I got to my computer later to find this note on my keyboard:
I had a bit of a laugh to myself - drama queen!
I need some tips from parents and coaches and other experts - how do you teach your child to be a good loser? Do you adopt the tough approach: make them lose again and again until they get used to it? Or do you try to explain nicely about winning and losing and how sometimes (or never?) you win and sometimes you lose? What says you guys?