Help! Santa answer needed.

This year for the first time I am participating in the Santa Shoebox Project - a wonderful, wonderful initiative whereby children (through their parents) give a shoebox filled with goodies to a child less fortunate than themselves.  The project hopes to gift 100,000 boxes to underprivileged kids across SA.  

Each shoebox should be decorated nicely and has to contain the following items:

• Tooth paste and tooth brush
• Wash cloth and a bar of soap
• An outfit of clothing
• Something educational / for school
• A toy
• Some sweets
• And of course anything extra you choose to include

The project has a great website (http://www.santashoebox.co.za/) that tells you exactly how to pledge a box and how to pack the box.  

The website says:

Although making a box for a 3 year old girl tugs at the heartstrings, it is often our teenagers who are in most need of your act of kindness.

In our experience, the teenage boys are the very last ones to be selected off the website and in reality - they are the ones who have probably had the hardest life and never have received anything like a Santa Shoebox before. Please include them in your selection.

So obviously I had to pick three teenagers! Two boys and a girl.  

I have bought all the goodies for the boxes and the next step is to decorate the boxes, I am so excited.  I might actually do another three.  It made me so sad to think that for some children getting a gift box with tooth paste and soap was something special, but that is the reality of the extreme poverty we have in our country.  

I was telling the twins about the project and how we would each be giving a child a special gift box.  They are very aware that there are plenty of people in this country who are far less fortunate than they are. Adam in particular gets very heart-sore about the plight of the underprivileged.

I said to them "Do you know, some poor children don't even get anything for Christmas, not a single thing, which is why we are going to give something special to them".

"Why?" asks Adam.

"Why are we giving a gift box to the children?" I reply

"No, why wouldn't Father Christmas give those poor children any presents?" he says.

OMG!  Why!  Why wouldn't he?? The selfish bastard! (I am really looking quite forward to the children realizing that Father Christmas is actually me. Sans the beard but with a slightly protruding belly and a splattering of grey hair).

I was completely stumped. What answer is good enough to explain why that jolly old chap in a red suit would be such a selfish asshole as not to give a single gift to the poor children who had it so tough already.

I stuttered and stammered and the best I could do was "um, I am not actually sure, I have no idea why".  I really was at a total loss. 

Adam thought for a moment and then said "Maybe it is because they are so poor that they don't have any paper or pens and so they can't write up their letter for Father Christmas and so he doesn't know what to bring them".

I agreed with him that could be a possible reason and that I would see if I could find out more.

Help! What should I have said? What would you have said the reason was why Father Christmas would not bring a gift for the poor children?

(For now, telling him that Father Christmas isn't real isn't an option. They have so few years in which to enjoy the fantasty of Father Christmas, I want to let it last as long as I can.  Kate already came home recently and said "Mom, guess what M said in class today, she said Father Christmas doesn't exist".  I replied that people believe different things and that although M's family don't believe in Father Christmas, we do.  So the end of the fairytale is coming soon. It would be nice to get one more Christmas out of it, for their sake. Even though the whole charade is damn hard work)

PS If you can, please consider pledging a box on behalf of your children to the children who Father Christmas has forgotten.  Click over to the Santa Shoebox Project website, it is a great website (well done to whoever built it) http://www.santashoebox.co.za/ 

 

 

Comments

[Shandra]

I know how annoying it is when you've said this isn't the answer but my own opinion is once they're old enough to ask those questions, they're old enough to get the full scoop. My line in the sand is if I have to start lying a lot to preserve the fantasy, it's kind of over.

Alternatively you can say they don't get anything _else_ and that the boxes are a way to share the spirit of Christmas between people. Or let it lie. If Adam doesn't ask again I would guess he doesn't want to know.

I don't recommend my parents' approach which was "they asked too many questions about Santa Claus, and he doesn't like that, so he stopped coming."

It's a pretty big question even for grownups, why poverty. So there's that. :)

[sunny]

Yes, I agree. I think when you are making up stories to protect the santa story, its time to stop. Especially because now you are asking them to believe Santa remembers everyone except poor kids. When natural common sense kicks in (and yes, its too soon!) its time to start talking about Santa as a story, as a game or whatever you choose to say.

I was really sad when my daughter was told the truth about Santa from a friend, she was only five!! I thought the fun of Christmas was over. but it wasn't a bit. Best to you.

[Heather]

We are Jewish, and I had to tell my daughter last year that Santa doesn't exist. Santa doesn't remember non-Christian children, either (much of the time, anyway). If Santa knows whether children have been good or naughty, and he doesn't visit, will the child then conclude they must have been naughty? My daughter had been waiting and waiting for Santa, to no avail, so I told her the truth (and told her not to tell her friends at school).

[Debbie]

3 boxes pledged,one from each kid and they will choose the items for th'their' boxes.

[Shes]

I tried not to encourage my daughter to 'believe' in Santa. I said he was a fun holiday character like Frosty or Rudolph. When she pressed me for an answer as to whether he was real or not (last year, at 4!), I told her the truth, and she still chose to believe he was real! Now when she asks, I say 'What do you think?'. She talks about kids at school who believe and I do the 'some families believe this, but this family believes that' routine. I grew up knowing he wasn't real, and I don't think I'm too scarred. Trying to not have her have that 'year of disappointment' when she 'finds out the truth', but I don't want to squash her independence in believing either!!

[Louise]

There is a similiar project done in Canada as well, with the boxes going overseas. I think I will have to get on this and do some this year. Thanks for the reminder.

http://www.samaritanspurse.ca/operation-christmas-child/

[Evilisa]

Tertia, what you did was spot on the right thing to do. Kids don't dwell like we do over these things. He has probably forgot all about it.

Let him believe as long as he wants to.

[Jade]

You could tell them something like this.
http://www.cozi.com/live-simply/truth-about-santa

[Evilisa]

I like that

[grega]

Hi there!

My name is Grega im from Slovenia and I am happy that I found your website since It has been a very interesting reading to me. Anyway I like your blog very much! I would like to share with you my blog that talks about (in)fertility. I made my blog for women who can't have babies and to help them conceive a baby as soon as possible with a method called Pregnancy Miracle. Many people have had success with "Pregnancy Miracle".

If you are interested you can check my blog at http://www.pregnancymiraclebylisaolson.com/

or simply just click: Pregnancy Miracle by Lisa Olson