As if there was not enough hate-fodder out there, guess what I will be doing in January?
The FABULOUS people at the very swanky One and Only Spa have invited me to have a beauty treatment, on the house! You have no idea how excited I am. This is what they suggested I have (how did they know!!)One&Only Body Wrap – Unwind Envelopment (60 mins)
Ideal for dry, dehydrated skin requiring nourishment and hydration. This envelopment uses ESPA Marine Mud, blended with skin softening essential oils which have moisturising and conditioning properties. Perfect for women who have had 3 weeks of non-stop intense quality time with their offspring, even though they should be just shut up and be grateful.
Re-hydrator Facial (60mins)
Ideal for dry, dehydrated and tired skin, this rehydrating facial is an excellent regenerating boost. Gentle deep-cleansing and exfoliation helps the skin to improve the absorption of nourishing facial oils and botanical rescue balm. The result is smooth, nourished skin. Ideal for women whose blog readers think she is a spoilt, ungrateful brat who should be taken outside and shot at dawn.
I am beyond excited. At first I thought I would miss out. The lovely Adele emailed me last week offering me a free treatment, to happen anytime within the next week. O.M.F!! Had she not read my blog?? Did she not know I am unable to leave the house even for two minutes sans the kids, never mind two hours. I nearly wept. I wrote back explaining that sadly I would have to miss out, but thank you very much and dear god how could you be so cruel as to tease me like this. And then she said I could delay until January, woohooo!
Apparently the hotel is VERY smart, it's where all the rich, famous people hang out. So on the day of my treatment, I shall disguise myself as a palm frond and go leopard crawling around the corridors with my point-n-click and take some photos of the celebs. I will report back in detail.
I am a lucky fish.
Hey! I have an idea! I am going to ask Adele whether they would sponsor another treatment for free and then someone can come with me!! That's a brilliant idea! A blog reader could come with me. Hold on, wouldn't that be awkward..... I'd have to share a spa treatment with someone I don't know and who might secretly hate me....hmmm...I'd have to make idle conversation....Oh what the hell, it might be fun and it would be great for someone else to experience a bit of luxury me-time.
Ok, hold on, before I get ahead of myself, let me check with Adele that this is possible. (Do you think it would be rude to ask for two extra spots? That way if the prize winner is a murderous stalker, there will be a witness to my fatal demise)
Very excited now, VERY!