Ok, now I feel sad. Not because it was a boy, but it feels so real now. I miss the child I’ll never meet.
Bye little boy.
I just got the call from my doctor. The baby had Patau Syndrome.
Most cases of Patau syndrome are not inherited, but occur as random events during the formation of reproductive cells.
Most embryos with trisomy 13 do not survive gestation and are spontaneously aborted. Of those surviving to term gestation, approximately 82-85% do not survive past 1 month of age, and 85-90% do not survive past 1 year of age. Certain malformations, especially holoprosencephaly and other central nervous system malformations, yield a more grave prognosis. Of those infants that survive past 1 year, most have few major malformations, but the prognosis remains poor, owing to multiple factors including long term neurological disability, feeding difficulty, and frequent pneumonia and other respiratory infections. There have been 5 cases reported in the medical history of patients living beyond 10 years of age.
I am glad I found out. Because it explains why I lost the pregnancy. It wasn’t my body. It helps to know that.
Am still sad though. Too many boys lost. Too many.
I was sitting in a coffee shop, working when I got the call from my doctor. I still am sitting here. A group of 10 women have just walked in. It’s a baby shower. The pregnant woman is talking about her last scan. About how the baby was hiding her face with her hand. I think I am going to leave now. Go home and hold my kids a little.
PS The pregnant woman is complaining about her weight gain. She just ordered a big slice of chocolate cake. Am I allowed to hope it goes straight to her hips?
add: I decided to finally find out the
sex of the baby I lost in 2002 due to trisomy 21. I’ve been too scared to find out until
now. Not sure why. It was a boy too. Too many boys lost, too many. That one in 2002, Luke in 2003, Ben in 2004
and now this latest little one. Sigh.
I’m fine. I am glad I found out. Just a little sad right now.