Blech. It really sucks being the new kid. I don’t know anybody; nothing seems to work, I
have no idea how to use the systems that are working (I only managed to figure out the phone system at 4pm yesterday!)…..
woe is me.
For 90% of the
150 people who transferred across to IBM, things have gone smoothly. It was an easy transition: you went from being a domino developer at the
old company to a domino developer in IBM. 90% of the staff still report into their same
boss and work at the same desk in the same building. (IBM has taken over the lease of our building
as there are more of us from the old company than there were IBM’er in the
region). Easy. Life goes on pretty much as it was before,
albeit with a few process changes and a new emblem on the door. However, for a handful of us who were in
non-technical roles like Sales and Marketing, the swap across wasn’t as
IBM is a lot more
complex and process driven than my old company. Understandably so. With 350,000
people across the globe, you have to be process driven and it is impossible to
escape some degree of complexity and yes, even bureaucracy. One can’t really argue against it too much;
they clearly are a very successful company. And they have done this type of transition
many times over.
Still. It still sucks being the new kid.
I am one of a
handful of people whose life has changed completely by the move across to IBM.
I have a completely new role, a new reporting line, and a new office location. And I don’t know how anything works. I felt like crying at the office yesterday,
but I thought I better not cry at my first day at work. They would think I was a total fruit cake /
baby. (I think I might be hormonal though, I am not normally such a big baby)
It’s just little
things: like accessing certain systems,
understanding how the telephone system works, getting assigned an extension and
PIN number …. Don’t get me wrong, I am sure IBM has an excellent orientation
programme, I am just an anomaly in terms of role change / remote location /
cost centre allocation / general gorgeous and divineness. Although I don’t feel particularly G&D at
all at the moment. Instead I feel very
spare part’ish and very lost. And to top
it all, it is IBM’s financial year end, so everyone is understandably snowed
under with targets and deadlines. I hate
bothering them to ask things like “excuse me, would you mind showing me where
the internal mail goes”. Sigh.
But! It will get better. Of course it will. I just hate not being on top of everything. I hate not knowing how everything works. But as Marko reminded me, I felt the same way
when I joined this last organization five years ago. My first time in IT. I was just as frustrated
and lost then.
In the meantime,
I’ll just battle along bravely and do my best not to cry in front of my new colleagues.
It is going to be a big enough shock to
them once the real Tertia comes out. (A “fuck” slipped out quietly yesterday,
hope no one heard. Better than a 'fart' slipping out, I suppose.)