Well, if you ask the question publicly, you should expect to receive all sorts of really honest and heartfelt answers.
Thank you to every one who has participated in the circumcision conversation, from both sides of the foreskin fence. I really appreciate that it was (mostly) done in an unemotional mature way. Some comments were quite pointed, those ones were the ouch ones. But that’s okay. I asked the question.
A few comments in response:
Some people seemed to be upset that I said I was leaving the decision up to Marko. You should know I am not the passive wallflower type, exact opposite in fact. I am not sitting here saying ‘oh big strong husband, the leader in our family, I am too thick to make a decision, you do it’. Believe me I know parenting children requires input from both parents (if there are two involved), it is just that I didn’t feel strongly for or against and he felt strongly for. If I had felt strongly about the subject in any way, not only would I have insisted on being involved in the decision, but Marko would have listened to my opinion. I am ‘allowing’ him to make the final decision, although even that is not cast in stone, I asked the question after all. Makes sense?
Some of you asked whether I was sorry I asked the question. Not at all. As you might have noticed I love asking questions and learning. I am open to various viewpoints and like to make educated decisions. I am going to be asking and raising lots more controversial view points in the very near future. Watch out for SAHM’s vs Working moms, styles of parenting, discipline etc. I embrace diversity, it is what makes us so interesting. And I love your input, whether it is for or against my beliefs.
I would have loved to have had some more input from men themselves, because after all, it is them that have to bare the consequences of this decision.
As for how common circumcision is here in SA, I don’t really know to be honest. It is a cultural thing and depends on what culture you belong to. Remember, we are a country of huge diversity, we have 11 official languages!! Having said that, all the men in my life are circumcised, it is what I know.
Another question was: has the conversation influenced my decision. It has made me think about it a lot harder than before. Because circumcision is the norm in my life, I hadn’t really thought about not doing it. I am now thinking about both sides of the foreskin/coin. I have to say though, that ferocity of emotion of the non-cutters makes me feel almost too scared to admit that I will / would have it done.
I have asked Marko to read the comments, I hope he does but I don’t hold out much hope, he is not a big reader I’m afraid. He reads about as much as he chats.
I am going to speak to the Dr about it, and ask his advice as well.
One thing I do agree on, is that I / we need to do what is best for OUR family. I just hope that we know what that ‘best’ is.
Thanks again to all of you for your input, much appreciated.
Oh, and may all your dreams and wishes come true in 2005! Two more hours to go here until midnight.