Act 4, Scene 3 – In which Hope makes her reappearance after a long absence.
Background: Waiting room, anxious Tertia writing up bad news blog entries in her head, Dr 30 minutes late.
Tertia goes in to consulting room.
Dr: “How are you doing?”
Tertia: “Ask me after the scan.”
Dr: “You really are cautious aren’t you.”
Tertia lies on bed.
Tertia: “Just tell me first, can you see the heartbreats.”
Dr looks for heartbeat in first baby – well-behaved child immediately jumps (acrobat!)
Tertia: (huge relief) “ok that ones alive, the other one?”
Dr looks for heartbeat in second baby – equally well-behaved child jumps and waves his arms. Phew!
Suddenly door crashed open and in skips Hope, singing on the top of her voice, la la laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
Tertia: “Where the hell have you been you fickle bitch?”
Hope: (puzzled look) “but you told me to go away and leave you alone?”
Tertia: (grudgingly) “Well, you can hang around for the next day or so. Can’t promise any thing longer than that. Now stop singing so loudly. We are only 10w3d, we have very very long to go.”
So all went well with the scan this morning. I spent a terrible weekend absolutely convinced it would be bad news today. I don’t know why. Just because I am a nervous wreck I suppose.
If stress really is that bad for the babies, I am totally fucked. Because I am permanently stressed out to the max. And please don’t tell me to relax and not to stress, believe me if I knew how to, I would. Suppose a glass of wine or two and a smoke would work but unfortunately that is out of the question.
Next HUGE step is the big level II nuchal translucency scan next Thurs. That is a big point for me, its where I have had very bad news before.
To CVS / amnio or not to CVS / amnio……….